12/14/09

Its funny how some things just get pushed off by the wayside as the year goes on. Some of which were a bit out of my control. Such as, for one, I have had such a hard time writing to this site. Why, you ask? Because earlier in the year, I think it was back in May, I lost everything on my hard drive to a virus and had to completely start over with every piece of stuff that I didnt have backed up. Very irresponsible of me since I am a techie by nature and work in the IT field. Having finally gotten most of what I could salvage back online, the few things that I could not figure out were how to successfully update my site. My configurations were all gone, and believe me, it was of the utmost priority that I get it taken care of, but one thing led to another, and as more things got in the way, this project has been pushed back further and further and before U know it, I hardly thought about getting it back up. So finally, I took some time out of my schedule of working, more working, and dating, yes, dating, we'll get to that, and finally got my shit together and put some brain time into it and made it happen. So here it is, over 7 months later, Im back. The next question would be, for how long? We'll get to that too.

Its been a great few months too though, dont get me wrong. A lot of changes have taken place in my life, a lot for the better if I can say so myself. Im finally dating again, YAY!. I have a BF now that is a great guy, and we've been dating since early June. We've been buddies for several years now, and even play softball for different teams, but seemed to gravitate towards each other off the field, which is pretty cool. As for whether it will work or not in the long run is still yet to be seen. We have our usual dating headbutts from time to time, but as long as there is communication open, I think we'll hang in there for a while. Like I always like to say, time will tell. I always said I wanted to date a bear cub, and now I have one of my very own, lol.

I'm still very much a part of my ex Husbear's life. We only live 2 miles from each other and he even has a new man in his life as well. We all get along quite well so far. We always joke that one of these days we're gonna have to all go out on a double date, then we look at each other and go, "Eew, wierd!" and drop it, lol. The important thing is that we all get along fine. I think that part is important to both of us.

Ok, next subject, I'm trying to think of this stuff in chronological order but I dont think its working. Im just putting it out there as it comes to my head, so bear with me. Oh yeah, Halloween this year had to have been one of the best ones I've had in ages, since here in Atlanta, it fell on Pride weekend too, so there was lots to do all weekend long. One of the things that was high on our list was all of the Halloween/Pride parties that took place in various places all around the city, and since it was on a Saturdy nite, the excitement revolved around all of the great costumes that we were gonna see out there. I knew I had to come up with something pretty festive for that reason alone. So I put my mind to it and tried to come up with something that would be wild and crazy and also very daring, and I think I came up with the perfect outfit for just such a personal request of myself. I had 2 ideas and one clearly won out over the other for the sheer logistics of the fact that it might have been ther easier of the two, given the limited time I had to work with. I knew I wanted to try body paint, but didnt know what I wanted to do with it. The first one I was gonna do was to paint myself blue and go out as the blue man from that superhero movie, U know, the naked one, but I wasnt about to go out completely naked in order to pull off a costume like that. So I chose the next best thing. I decided to paint myself completely red with latex body paint and go as the Devil himself. Now that feat was in itself, tail and all, because I did want to go out with the same or almost the same premise as the naked blue guy, so I made a few minor adjustments so as not to get arrested in the process. I decided to forego the jockstrap simply because I didnt want lines in the latex. Besides, it would move, and rip, and I just wasnt gonna deal with it. So instead of the jockstrap, I decided to glue the cup portion directly to my crotch. No lines, no fuss. The rest, was painted on over top of it. Now, it had occurred to me that this feat could NOT be handled alone and I needed some major help in the painting department. I had this handled with some of my closest friends on my Softball team. There's nothing that says bonding like walking up to someone U just hit a few balls with out on the field and saying, "Hey, would U mind painting my crack?", lol. I actually found a few takers who went above and beyond the call of duty to help me pull this off. All in all, it took 4 guys, and 2 hours of me standing in the middle of my kitchen butt ass naked with my arms out while they painted my freshly shaved, yes, I had to shave it ALL, body. The end result, however was GREAT. It was exactly what I wanted it to look like. I will have to post some of the pics of that night soon. And Yes, I mean soon. I am back and definitely want to get them out there. The whole night was fun to pull off. I can actually say I walked around the bar 99% naked for a night. As I said, I'll let U see them soon.

Thats all for now, Im tired of writing at the moment and its bedtime. I'll be back soon.
Til next time,

Woof/Harry Wolfe.

 

7/13/09

I can honestly say that I have had one of the best summers in recent memory, and its just getting started. Every time I write here it seems like Im always commenting on how so much has gone on since the last time. I need to stop doing that and just write more frequently. That way I remember it all. I'll start at the top, or as close as I can get.

This past spring, the guys on the softball team I played on last year were uncertain as to whether or not we'd be playing together again since we had effectively lost our sponsor from the previous year. Only 4 of us from the onset were committed enough to try and salvage the team with what it was, so we came up with a plan, to all get together and pull it together without a sponsor. It took a lot of work from the core group but we were able to not only make it work, but have been much better at playing and winning to the point that we're one of the top 3 teams in our division. Thats saying a lot from where we were last year. I've also made a great core group of friends out of this team, and we spend a lot of time off the field and on. I consider a lot of them my brothers. It was just the thing I needed after the breakup. I mean, ExBear and I still get along great, but I kinda needed my own identity after being with him for such a long time. Now I have that. Or at least achieved my individuality again.

Since being single for a while now, Im starting to actually start thinking about dating again. I've gone on a few dates, but nothing serious til now. He's quite the hot man in my opinion. He's sweet, kinda shy, unlike me, and seems to be just what I need to make something special out of the whole thing. He plays softball too, which is kind of a turnon for me lately. We even play each other on occasion, so the rivalry kinda turns up the heat. Its still too early to tell what will become of it, but we'll see what lies down the road. Wish me luck.

On to other fun things, I just turned 40 a few days ago, and its great to cross that threshold into a new decade and believe me, I made sure to ring in my new year in a BIG way. Some guys on the softball team got together and helped pull off what I will deem as the best birthday party I've had in 40 years. We were able to use a bar in Midtown and had had about 90 or so of my closest friends and what I consider family, softball team included, and throw down with all the craziness we could put together. I was "roasted" by a my good friend and part time Drag Queen, Ruby Red, did body shots on the bar followed by "cake" shots, dont ask, lol, as well as live DJs and all the wild pictures U can throw a stick at. Those will remain under my care and close supervision, thank U very much, lol. Needless to say, it was a party I wont soon forget, and some parts, will eventually start to remember, lol. To those of U out there that were able to attend, as well as those that came from so far away, Los Angeles, SC, KY, and around town here, I thank U so much for the party of a lifetime.

And the parties are just beginning this summer. Lots on my plate, so lots to talk about soon.
Next order of business, what to do with this site when the time is up again. Keep it or get rid of it. Thats the big question of the year. I guess you'll find out when I do.
Til next time.

 

5/1/09

Let this be a testament to how busy of a year its been. I havent updated this thing since New Years Day, lol. Now thats as worse as its gotten, but make no mistake, its been a wild ride. I have now gotten accustomed to the fact that this time of year up until late july is just going to be completely busy for me, not so much with just work, but my weekends are now so jam packed with activities that I now have to come to work in order to "rest" and slow down. Its a good feeling but Im slowly learning my boundaries as far as stretching myself too thin. With that said, lots of things are going on that Im quite happy to report about; changes and new opportunities that are arising in the future, new ventures or so it may seem. I'll explain below:

For one, Im extremely proud to say that I've been taking up a little more of my spare time, however little it may be, with my bass guitar lessons. I had to quit a couple of years back with professional lessons because I got laid off from an old job that was supporting my continuing, so I would read on my own and teach myself. I got lazy and stopped the reading and for a while, even put down the bass altogether to do other things. Since picking it back up again, I've continued with my ear training in an effort to "perfect" this new hobby. Recently, its started to pay off when I happened to chat with a co-worker of mine that I work with indirectly in another building and discovered that he also plays a bass. Not only did he play bass, but he plays several instruments as well as teaches his wife to play drums in his fully finished basement where he and several other friends get together on certain weekends to jam out with whatever other instruments they can bring that night. I was extended an invitation to come join in sometime.

Now this was an opportunity that has never been extended to me and up until recently, have only played alone in my apartment with nobody around and completely free to make whatever mistakes without any embarassment of stopping and stopping. If I accepted, I would most certainly face my biggest challenge in this area of finding out exactly how good or how bad I really am. And that scared the hell out of me. I imagine that every serious or even hobby musician like myself across the board has had this first experience jitterfest when actually faced with playing for the first time in front of other people that are depending on U just to keep up especially if they have played before and have a rapport with the others in their little group. I was assured that everyone is there to jam and have fun, and he knew that I just wanted to get my feet wet and that nobody had any expectations and basicly, we would just have a few drinks, kick back, and play around til we make something sound halfway decent. "The more drinks we have, the better we'll sound" was the theme of the night, according to this guy. So I accepted his invitation and that night, I loaded up my gear and made my way to the burbs to hang with the big boys. I was told that we'd be playing anything from hard rock, to blues, to pop. I myself being a die-hard Prince fan, wanted to try to bring the funk to the group and see what I could remember from my lessons.

I got there just as the others were starting to arrive and I was led into the basement to setup. His wife had an impressive drum kit setup and had been taking lessons for a few weeks so she was almost as nervous as I was about playing with other people but she had been doing it for a few more times than I had. The rest had guitars and a song list in which to choose songs they had already practiced before. My goal was just to keep up and not look like a fool in front of these people. I had no idea what their skill level was but based on their practicing before we actually got started, I was at a great disadvantage. We finally started to play something simple that I could follow along with at my own pace. I was the only bass player there so I just sounded out the rhythm and kept going. We finished one song and went to the next, which was progressively a little more difficult than the first, but again, I kept up and started to get a feel for this. There were a few mistakes but nothing worth stopping everyone else from doing their own thing. And then the next song, and the next, which were songs that I knew but had never played, and again, I kept up just fine. By the 4th song I was really getting my groove together and was doing quite well for myself, we didnt stop but a few times to get the others to find their keys and flesh out the songs that they were unfamiliar with. The most amazing thing happened after a few more songs though that I had to stop and say WOW! We stopped for our first break to refresh our drinks and grab some snacks, and I was so getting into playing with this group of guys that I forgot about the time. Our first set was finished and we had now been playing nonstop for the past 2 hours. 2 HOURS??? I made it for 2 Hours and hadnt thought about the fear of messing up, slowing down or anything. All I wanted to do was to keep playing. I was on a roll that I didnt want to end. I had amazed even myself to how well I kept up. The other guys patted me on the back and said that I was doing just fine. Now I know that the goal is to just hang out, and I know that if I finished the night and didnt get invited back, then I completely sucked and really should practice more before trying something like this again. At least, thats what was in my head, so I was looking to impress and not fall flat on my face. That was the goal for the night.

We continued on and played some more with a few more breaks. I even sat behind the drum kit and tried a few songs while she took her break. Actually came up with a few cool beats that the guys just jammed to out of the blue. I was impressing myself to no end that night and was on a high that nobody could push me down from. From there, we took our places and played a few more hours and finally closed up shop at 3 in the morning, the 6 hour mark. I couldnt believe I pulled off one of my biggest dreams since starting this little hobby of mine, to play well with others, with my clothes on, LOL. I was exhausted, but still sailing by the time I got home. My biggest regret about the night was that there were no pictures or video taken. Its not something that they normally think of doing, but it would have been fine. I was just too in the moment to remember something like that, but make no mistake, I will commemorate the session next time, and yes, I have been invited back for more. Now to fit it into my schedule which is the hard part, lol.

Im gonna break this down into 3 segments for the most part so I can get more into a routine of updating this thing. I'll try that for a few days to see how it goes. I've got to stop looking at updating this site in one big purge of information and rather small things that go on because I will forget so much by the time I get around to it. So see ya in a few days.

 

1/1/09

Time for an update, ya think? LOL. Im afraid Im gonna be all over the place on this one. My thought process is not as it should be just because its been a crazy week and I’ve got lots to say and don’t know where to begin, so bear with me.
Lots happnin and not enough time to write it down, but of course, I'll try, as usual. I had some time to actually sit and reflect on the past year and how my life has truly changed. Some for the better, some for the worse, but we wont call it that. We'll agree to call it areas worth improving. It seems to have a much better ring to it.

Im no longer calling myself newly single, since its been a good year now that the ExHusbear and I split up, relationshipwise. When U think about it though, compared to the fact that we were together a solid 10 yrs, and I've been single now for only one, Newly single does kinda still have its place in my life. We still have our friendly relationship and I think we will always be close. We have truly beaten the awkward ex phase and have remained very close friends. As a matter of fact, we recently celebrated what we now call our 1 year "Un-niversary" out with friends. On the day of our anniversary, he sent me an email at work with the subject line: "Just wanted to wish U a Happy Anni....Oops, Sorry." We had a big laugh about it, and had dinner later on, to celebrate our long standing friendship. I only wish other exes could be so lucky when relationships evolve like ours has. I mean, this Christmas, we had dinner at my apartment with about 8 guests, and we both shared in cooking the dinner. It made sense to do it at my place since I did get the table in the divorce, lol. But with it all said, its been a so-so year.

Im relearning all the "tricks" to being single, and the benefits and shortfalls that it bestows. I can say that I've been on a few roller coaster of dating scenarios this past year, trying to get my feet wet again, so to speak. I say Roller coaster because after the few semi serious attempts to reconnect with the dating world, the men I was interested in ended up being just that, typical men, and when its all said and done, U look back and realize that you have just been taken for one big ride. With that said, I've learned to pick up some really good eye opening traits and also some really irrational bad habits when it comes to who I select as a possible dateable guy. That irrational part is that of the scenario is that I have stricken one name in particular off my list of ever trying to get involved with, since both guys I briefly dated and thought things were serious, and in the end, left, both shared the same name in either the first or middle names. So I am leery and probably wont do that again. I'll ask up front when meeting a guy, "Does your name have the name ***** in the first, middle or last?" If so, we probably wont talk for much longer. I know, its totally irrational, and I know that, but its mine to be irrational with and Im gonna own it. Lets move on.

The good, being that I am ready to enjoy being single, since I've now moved out into the world in my own apartment. Having a great time meeting people and actually being able to say, sure, come on over to my place for dinner, or whatever, if the time is right. Its becoming my own space and I've already thrown several party to really make it feel like home.

As I said, I know Im all over the place with my topics tonite, but can someone please tell me this? What is the big problem with dating a guy that’s done porn? Nowadays, it seems like everybody’s out there doin it and its no big deal. I started going on a couple of dates with a guy recently and as soon as he found out, that’s the last I heard from him. Its just not right, I tell ya. Does porn make me a bad person? A dirty person? I think not, well, only in the mind. It’s the perception of what it entails I guess. I don’t know. Somebody help me out here. Its only happened once but if this is going to be a trend, then someone has to change that perception. I don’t have time for that kind of crap. I’ve had a very interesting few years, take me as I am or move on. Apparently Im goin thru a few that have chosen to move on. Next time I’ll cut to the chase and open with. “Hi. My name is ------, and I’ve done porn. You’re cute.” If they turn and run from that point, then it wasn’t meant to be. Oh well, enough of the ranting on that issue.

On another important note, one that has something directly to do with this site and my journey with it, I decided a while back this year to actually put the porn thing to rest. It was something I wanted to do, I did it, now its time to move on to something else. As for the site. I have it til mid summer, then once the site expires, I’ll let it go. Harry Wolfe will always be someone I can look back on and say, Hey, I was him for a while, and be done with it. I think I’ll focus on my bass playing a little more and try to join a band. I think I’ve gotten good enough to follow along with just about anything I hear on the radio, so lets find a band to test my knowledge so far. Who knows, I could have a whole new career waiting for me. For the next few months, I’ll try to add more pics from the collection I have but have never released. Might take some time to pick out the ones I want to share, but I’ll try to come up with something fresh for the impending doom of this site, lol.

For now, that’s it, my fingers are tired, Im gonna stop here til next time.

Happy Holidays, Guys,

Woof/Harry Wolfe.

 

 

9/9/08

I guess I could start this whole thing out by extensively apologizing for being so absent from this site for so long, in fact, the entire summer, which is normally well beyond what I've done in the past. I could promise profusely that I'll try to be better at writing, as so many of you have written asking "Whats up?" I could do all that, sure, but I'm not going to. I say that for this reason, over the summer of putting things on the backburner, my priorities have shifted, my life has changed, and quite frankly, I'd gotten bored with it for a while. I didnt know if I wanted to even continue writing at all. Sometimes I had so much time on my hands that it would be just second nature to just pickup and start blogging my heart out onto the screen like I used to do. That just didn't happen. I think that some of it came from being so busy in my day to day life and so many things were happening that I would put it off for this huge, grand, novel of a posting that it became too much to write and I put it off. At any rate, Im not apologizing and making promises anymore because if I slip and fall back again into not writing, Im gonna disappoint the few people that come back time and time again waiting for the next installment of my post. So, here it is, if its here, read on. If not, just know that will at least say goodbye before signing off for good. So there, now that I've gotten that off my chest, on with the good stuff.

My summer has been, for all intents and purposes, phenomenal to say the least. I've done things in the past 3 months that I could have only dreamed of when it came to even my own fantasies. I've met a lot of new friends, as well as severed ties with others for reasons I wont go into here. Its all in the transition of things that life has to throw at you from time to time. Take your lumps and move on. But overall, I'd have to rank this summer right at the top.

Lets go back now, shall we? The last time I wrote was early June. I had been preparing to celebrate my birthday in grand style, where I normally go, the local strip club, surrounded by all my friends, drinking the night away. Well, somehow, the turnout was far beyond, what I expected, since everyone knows that when inviting people to a party, only about 50% actually show up, if that, even if they all say they will attend, so to get a bigger crowd, you sort of "overbook" on your invitations. Now mind U that this was no e-vite thing or a formal inviatation by any means, this was, sending out a blanket text, and word of mouth, kinda, "Hey its my birthday in a week, come help me celebrate here at this time, no gifts, just be there". U go to the party destination and whoever shows up, is there and the party commences. Well, that didnt happen this time, or should I say it did, but without the 50% rule in place. I invited about 30 plus people to be there, in a club where normally, when we do this for others at this particular spot, we take a few tables, preferably up front and close to the stage for the Birthday boy, whoever he may be, and the others pull tables around as they arrive to join the group.

By the middle of the evening, there's like maybe a small mass of maybe 10 or so people gathered around one spot in the bar where if U can see the clusters of similar groups, you can usually tell there's some sort of birthday gathering goin on. Wouldnt U know, that by the time the night was half over, and I was slowly losing my consciousness due to birthday shots ordered for me by the gallon it seems, I turned around to see the group of people that were there for my party, I think I about cried, on the inside, of course, because as far as I could see, the entire left side of the bar, which takes up quite a bit of space, was for me. So I started to count all the heads that were there, and pulled up a total of about 35 to 40 people in total who showed up, some brought friends as well, which was fine, the more the merrier in party situations, but that shocked even me. In past years, I've only had maybe 15 at the most show up. Granted, I do know the main draw of the evening was to get to see the dancers in nothing but, well, nothing. However, it was very comforting to know that they were there because I invited them. That gives me the warm and fuzzies to no end, lol. Long story short, I ended up celebrating the weekend with my softball team, my ex and our friends, had a 2, yes, 2 day hangover and had more fun than I think I've ever had on previous birthdays ever. I think that for my 40th next year, I may not do the strip bar but something more official. U only turn 40 once, legally, at least, lol.

Along with summer and my birthday, our Pride weekend is pretty much a hand in hand event because one normally falls within a week of the other. This year, however, was drasticly different because of the Park restrictions and the water restrictions and so many other restrictions that Atlanta wasnt allowed to hold it in the normal place, and not even during the normal time. Instead, we had to hold it 2 weeks later in a Civic Center parking lot. How lame is that? Very lame. There was such little audience participation this year and what we were left with wasnt all that impressive. We stayed for the duration of the parade, did a once around in the parking lot where all the tents were holed up, then left. Pretty sad if U ask me.

Next was the end of Softball season, and I have to say, despite the fact that I was on one of the losingest teams in the division, we certainly knew how to drink after each game, lol. If I've strengthened anything this year, its gonna hands down go to my liver, lol. All jokes aside, its been a great year with them and Im so glad I joined when I did. I have met a group of guys that Im gonna be friends with for a very long time. We all have our little idiocyncracies, that grate on each other's nerves, but thats what family does, in no uncertain terms. Some of them have gotten closer to me than others, but I love em all just the same. Im comin back next year, so watch out.

Things at home have been strained as far as my living arrangements were. When the Husbear and I broke up last November, I decided to stay and stick it out for a while to see to it that our friendship remained intact. I feel like we both believe that after 10 yrs of being together, there is no sense in walking away with nothing to show for it. I'm extremely glad we both took that feeling to heart, because we're still friends, havent killed each other, and still see each other as family. That being the emotional part of it, is quite different from the physical part of it, and when I say that I mean the living arrangement. I was relegated to live in the "office" on the futon as in the terms of the divorce. Which was fine, at first, but as time went on, I started to feel my identity slip, meaning, my living space started to be my only spot in the house that was really mine anymore, which is understandable, but I had finally reached the realization that it was high time I found a place of my own. The walls in the office were really starting to close in on me. So thats what I did. And with that decision, I moved out into my own apartment just under a month ago, granted, 2 miles away from where we both lived, its something that I can call my own.

I've pretty much had to start again from the ground up as far as furnishing the place, but its been worth it, and with the help of close friends, I've been able to slowly build it up into something nice to actually come "home" to at night. I still see the ExHusbear at least 3 times a week as we're still very close, however I'm slowly starting to find my independence again, since even though we werent together anymore, I didnt really feel the fact set in that we were apart. Now that its truly a fact, Im finding it a bit exciting yet scary in the same breath to be on my own again. We'll see how it goes.

Well, as far as being single again, I guess I can do one of two things. I can be single and enjoy it for what it is, or start dating again, or at least try to. I've dabbled in the dating field a bit since the breakup, but living with your ex can be a steady date killer, as people have told me as well as experienced on my own. Its always the same no matter who U are, as in the ones U want, rarely ever want U, and the ones that want U, are never the ones U want. I've even dated steadily for a good month or two with one person that after pushing for a relationship so hard in the beginning, only ended up leaving me for someone he met a month before with the excuse, "well, if I had only met U a month earlier...." to that, I'll say "we'd be broken up a month earlier too", but Im not bitter, so I let it go for what it was, a cheap fling that in the end, meant nothing but a fun roll in the hay. So be it. Now, Im slowing it down, but have gotten myself quite smitten with one person I met this spring. We've gotten to know each other and have gotten close, but again, I think I've gotten attatched to someone who in the end, isnt a cheap fling, but someone who is, to me, simply unobtainable. We've gone on a few dates, had a great time together, and he's expressed some interest in me at first, but, when it all comes down to it, I get the feeling that when I look at it and see it for what it is, he's just not all that into me. Well, not enough to at least attempt to settle down and really concentrate on what I might be able to offer into his life. He plays sports like nobody's business, constantly on the go, and Im finding myself to be the needy and insecure one when it comes to the intimacy part of it, partly because of the insecurities brought on by the previous dating fiasco. I mean I have my own self to blame in some of it, meaning I saw it coming, but as I've learned, one doesnt necessarily take one's own advice, and thats a very bad thing. I can talk the hard talk and face the issues of other people's problems better than most psychiatrists out there, but put an emotional dilemma on my plate and I just crumble. Where's all that good advice I had to give to someone else? Gone, lol. But as far as the new guy goes, he's a true sweetie, and I really like him a lot, and he knows it, because I have told him on more than one occasion. And we've even "gone there" a few times, but ultimately, its his call on whether to move further or not. But I've also determined that I'd be a fool to put my life on hold while he finds himself, and hopefully me in the future. So until the day that I decide to let go and be "friends" and leave it at that, slowing down is not an option, however, maybe keeping the light on for him isnt so far fetched. We'll see.

So there U have it. The many multiple reasons for my long absense from my own site. I wont apologize because its been my own learning experience and life experience that tells me that I have my own time frame for doing things. And when the time is right to come back to the site, then I'll do so in my writing. Looks like I've had plenty to tell so far. And as long as I dont get too behind, I might have more to say, but again, no promises to do anything but to have fun along the way.

Until next time.

Woof/ Harry Wolfe

 

6/2/08

Hey guys, I know its been way too long since I have written in here and its long overdue for an update so here it is. I have been quite busy with things in the real world that have kept me from coming back as much as I normally did. Truth be told though, there were times over the last 8 weeks that I simply didnt feel like writing. There were too many things in my personal life that were interfering with me having a little peace and quiet and the mental capacity to focus on anything but what I was dealing with at the moment. With that said, I have regained my thoughts and composure long enough to at least put a little something down in this space, so here goes.

Looking back at where I was, my main focus was softball at the moment. Well, over the weeks, I have developed quite a few things worth noting. I have improved 100% thru diligent practice and personal practice with both hitting and catching the ball. I am now playing every other game, due to the amount of people on our team, we switch people out so that everyone gets a chance to play. I have acquired such a strong group of friendships from joining the league this year not only from my teammates as well as other teams. After jumping out of my shell on this one and trying something I had never tried before, Im so glad I did this year. We're having too much fun to really concentrate on anything but fun. We only have a few more weekend games left to play, so come see us sometime if U get a wild hair. We play at the Atlanta Metro Fields down off Fulton Ind. Blvd. Every Sunday and then drink our asses off at whatever the host bar of the week may be. We'd love to have U.

On other fronts, I think I mentioned very briefly on the fact that I was starting to get out there and date again. I think Im ready to at least venture out and see what these men out here have to offer as well as do they like what I have to offer them, and no, not entirely sexually. If there's anything I've learned out of my past 10 yr relationship, its that sex is important, but not all important. So far, I have had some really good ups as well as some terrible lows in this field, by allowing myself to let someone get as close and really hurt me. This was all done by going way too fast and opening up more than I was willing to get hurt. But someone also told me, that its all a risk when U put yourself out there like that and there will be times when U do it and the other person responds accordingly. It can also happen the other way, when U put yourself out there to be vulnerable, U dont get what U want, but the bigger picture is that U were able to regroup, pull yourself together, and start over again, and most importantly, learn from your mistakes. If U can take that lesson into consideration, the next time wont be so hard. However I am finding it a bit harder to trust people in that arena again, so I'm gonna just lay back and see what comes to me for a while. Sure, I have an occasional FB, who doesnt? But I'll save the feelings for someone I really know and learn to trust over time. So Im closing the book on that for a while. Lets have some fun.

As I mentioned in my little blurb on the main page, I went to IML last weekend in Chicago and had a blast as always. I ran into old faces, new faces, and even got to settle a complete misunderstanding on my part with someone who I can now consider a friend. U should have seen how well we made up, lol. M, U know who U are, and I hope U see this. Here's to a great new friendship, and if ever in Atlanta, U have a place to stay and a tourguide at that, if we ever crawl out of bed, lol.

I got to finally see the finished version of what will be my last movie to be released. Its called "Code Black" from ForbiddenFunkMedia. I have my copy and it will soon be available to purchase online, and if things work out, I will sell them from my own website and even autograph a few in the process. I will keep U informed on that should it come to light.

Last on my list, June is my Birthday month. The real date is on the 20th, but I was encouraged by a very good friend a few years ago to celebrate the whole month instead of just the day. So thats what Im doing. 38 was such a great year, lets see how well 39 treats me. We'll find out on the 20th. I'll keep y'all posted.

Stay safe y'all,
Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

4/10/08

Almost 6 weeks and I hadn’t written a thing. That’s almost a record for me. Running around like crazy trying to learn new things about yourself does that to U. I’ve been allowing myself to try a few new things, stretch my limits of what I want to try to accomplish. I know, I haven’t finished my first paragraph and already I’m speaking in circles. Lets try this again, shall we?

First off, the movie, Code Black, that was slated for release in March, has been pushed back. As for a release date, I have no idea. My thing is, it will get here when it gets here. So stay tuned on either my site or the company’s website at www.forbiddenfunk.com for details. I promise U, it will be a good one.

As for other activities in my life, still considering myself newly single after 10 yrs, I’m starting to open myself up again for a little fun, whether it be platonic or not, its better than sitting around moping, so I have gone on a few dates as of recent, as well as taken up a brand new activity altogether, sports. More specifically, that sport would be softball. I joined a gay softball league for the first time. For the sake of picking a place to start, lets start with the softball.

I joined the softball league because I wanted to try something new, and the fact that I always wanted to try it. Plus it’s a great new way to meet guys as far as Im concerned, and there are plenty to be met, if U ask me. I am on a team that puts you on a team based on your ability to play. The leagues are broken down from A to D. A, being the most competitive and experienced players, and D, for those that want to just come out, hit the ball a few times, and have some fun in the process. As you progress thru the years, U are reevaluated and U might go up a league or possibly down, or stay right where U are. So for all intents and purposes, since I haven’t hit a ball since the 8th grade, Im placed cozily in the D league, which is just fine by me. We go to practice every Saturday, and play on Sundays with the other teams in town, and afterward, go to a host bar and drink to the fact that we made it thru our games in one piece, or sometimes, drink to those who didn’t, and that does happen a lot.

So I got onto a specific team based on a coach in a D league that I knew was looking for players. He told me to come to practice and we’ll take it from there, which I did. What I didn’t know, was that the first practice I attended was their 3rd and it was to involve a scrimmage game against another practicing team, which was cool. It allowed me to actually see where I stood in my hitting and catching ability in a firsthand game situation. Man, oh man, why did I go and do that?

My first time at bat since the 8th grade, in my head, it was simple. Just go to the plate, hit the ball as far as it would go, and run. I mean, how hard could it possibly be? The ball was pitched, I swung, Strike 1! And again, Strike 2! Now keep in mind, that there was another team as well as others onlooking from the stands as we played this exhibition game, and as far as I was concerned, the entire world, including national news cameras were there too to capture my humiliation on tape, at least that’s what was playing in my head. In reality, there was no more than a crowd of 30 total, and they probably weren’t paying attention to me until the next pitch, but the previous scenario was all too much in the forefront of my mind. This last pitch is make or break for me. The pitch was thrown, I swing, Strike 3! Ok, Im out. So Im worse off than I thought I was when I started. This game is no longer simply hitting the ball, because I have this aversion to none other than, hitting the ball! Since it’s a game scenario, I make my way off the plate, tail between legs and rather quickly so that the other players can hit, I want to slink away deep into the dugout and totally rethink ever joining the league in the first place. If I cant hit the ball, what am I doing here? Well, in reality, I had made it a foot off the plate towards the dugout when I hear the umpire and my new coach screaming to me. Let him hit the ball! The ump agrees and I look into the other team’s eyes as they stand there, waiting for the pity party to begin.

At that moment, I felt like the lowest form of life on earth. I was going to get another shot at bat simply because I couldn’t hit the ball like everyone else within 3 pitches. Well, I knew it couldn’t have gotten worse but I was at least going to hit the ball. I was getting my coach standing behind me, telling me how to stand, the umpire was posturing me over the plate, as well as the coach from the other team, trying his best to give me some encouragement. Now I ask U, HOW SAD IS THAT??? Strike 4 and 5 made me want to dig a hole right at the plate and crawl into it. We were practicing in a neighborhood that had houses all around the softball field and at that moment, the humiliation I was suffering felt like every home in sight had people perched out their windows and porches filled with curious onlookers yelling helpful hints on how to hold the bat, swing the bat and to keep my eye on the ball. I had never felt so much embarrassment in my entire life. No wonder I hadn’t picked up a bat since the 8th grade. I could have been time warped back to the same ball park I failed so miserably at before. Strike 6 and 7, made me sink even lower, but they wouldn’t let me leave the plate til I hit the ball. By the 8th pitch, I swung, made contact with the ball, I heard and felt the contact with the bat as I swung with all my might. The ball fell 2 feet in front of me and was, based on the rules of the game, a good ball. With that, I threw the bad down in front of me, screamed a resounding “I’ll take it!” and took off to first base, lol. The crowd cheered as I made it safely to first base, either glad that I had finally hit the ball or that the ordeal of holding up the game waiting on a pity pitch. Either way, I was glad it was over and I could breathe again. Now if that experience didn’t humble me as to how much practice I really needed, then there was no help for me.

I feel like doing this has accomplished a few things for me. I have made a new group of friends that are in the same position as me, that want to come out and have fun, as well as I’ve made myself busier to take my mind off of things going on at home. Don’t get me wrong, its not bad at all at home, its just helping me to stay in shape, or try to anyway. We’ve already had a pre-season tournament in Birmingham, AL, which in my opinion, helped solidify the group as a team and more like a family. We had a great time and wont soon forget getting to know everybody on both our team and others as well.

OK, I see I’ve talked your ear off already on just softball alone, so I’ll come back in a week or so to discuss other stuff, lol. And hopefully add a few more pics to this site.

Later guys,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

2/19/08

Picture this, scenario, for just a moment. You've been kidnapped by two hot black leathermen in a bar, after hours, wearing nothing but boots, a jock, and harness. Your wrists are cuffed and secured on a chain link fence high above your head. The two that have U captive are taking turns roughing U up and forcing U into submission until finally, U have no choice but to give in to their devious and nasty intentions. They force U to suck their huge dicks, getting them hard and ready for whats to come next. They take turns fucking U while U have no choice but to hang there and take their dicks up your ass for what seems like an eternity, pushing your face and body into the fence, causing marks that feel like they'll be permanent based on the force of the pressure they are putting on your body. Finally, when they're done fucking U, they lower your arms and body to a lower position so that they can force U to suck their dicks to their pleasure, and your forced effort not to gag uncontrolably. All of this culminates with them spraying your face with their hot cum and leaving U a heaping mess on the floor as they are finished using U for their fun. Pretty hot fantasy if I dont say so myself. But it really happened, to me, on the set of the latest film I have been priviledged to work on by a brand new, New York based company called Forbidden Funk Media.

The link to the site is here at www.forbiddenfunk.com. The goal of the movie is to show men of color playing together in a hardcore leather environment. The men assembled for this film were brought from all over the country as well as a few locals for a weekend that I consider one of history making proportions. I had a blast and was able to bond with everyone there and have made some pretty cool friends in the process. One of the experiences I will remember most was being able to play with, though off camera, one of my biggest porn crushes in my life, Mario Ortiz himself. Up until minutes before we were all supposed to be on the set, I had no idea he was even going to be involved in the film. I played it cool on the outside, but inside, I was a dizzy school girl standing next to her alltime crush. We hit it off in conversation, and somehow, dont ask me how it happened, but I have learned to expect the unexpected on porn sets, but next thing U know, his dick was out, my dick was out, and I was on my knees in front of him doing the fluff job of a lifetime. Unfortunately we werent in the same scene on camera, but what a show we got to put on behind the scenes, and dont think I didnt get pics of that event, lol. The world will probably never see them, strictly for my eyes and fantasies to cum, lol. The finished product is called "Code Black" and will be available March of 2008. I'll keep U posted on any events to happen after that.

Its been yet another month and already, Im racking up the mileage on my roadtrips by an astounding rate, not that its such a bad thing. I have had my fun along the way. Being single again has put up quite a few "challenges" in my path that I've had to adjust to, namely, the main one is trying to live in the same house as your ex. It does have its advantages and disadvantages, but for the meanwhile, its in a concentrated effort to save the friendship, which I think we have successfully done so far. It aint easy, but worth it in the long run. Still not any mood to date by any means, besides, its only been a few months in comparison to the 10 yrs we were together, but a little fun along the way wouldnt hurt, would it? Is it too much to ask? I dont think so, at least thats my take on it. A man does have needs, lol.

Where was I? Oh yeah, roadtrips. I am in the process of changing jobs and have quite a bit of downtime, which has been, so far, a well planned event. I basicly have a month off to myself before the new job starts. So nothing screams road trip like sitting in your house with nothing to do for a month with your ex always under foot. My first trip, would be back home to KY for a much needed visit with friends and relatives that I wasnt able to see the last time I was there. Its always a constant struggle when I go there because there are so many people I have to see, and not enough time to do it in. Family has a wonderful knack for guilting U into spending more time than U really want or can stand in one sitting, let alone a full week. So I decided to play this trip smart with an experiment I think is going very well. I decided to stay in KY for 2 weeks, and in that time, spend a week with friends, then the next week, with family. Now the family didnt know I was in the area the week before, so there were no guilt ridden calls on when I was going to make it out their way, or why havent U taken every waking moment to visit this person or that person. I feel a little guilt from time to time while I am here, not seeing family when I know I should at least let them know Im in town, but that all changed once I got a phone call from a close relative, just to say hello, and then dumping all the family "drama" on me as if I could do anything about what another relative has decided to do, crazy or not. And with family, its always crazy, in some way or another. That phone call in itself just changed my guilt to the gnawing question of, "do I really want to tell them that Im here at all?", lol. But in the end, Im still going to spend a lot of time with them while Im here, just not all my time.

So the first week of my 2 week visit, as I said, was with friends, and I even called a friend of mine in Columbus, OH, just to shoot the breeze while I was in the area. In the end, I decided to take a nice weekend trip to see him as well. Why not, I have no obligations of family til next week, right? So I hop in the car and make the 3 hr trip in yet another city for fun and debauchery with an old friend. Well, that old friend had a wild hair up his ass and came up with an even better idea farther fetched than I had even planned by going up to Columbus. He said, lets go out on the town here tonight, and then after that, we can get up in the morning, and head up to party in Cleveland tomorrow night. What the hell? I was halfway there, nothing to lose but sleep, while on vacation, so thats a no brainer. We packed up the car and spent the weekend in both places. I have to say, I had a great time hanging with him and if I had more time, would have spent the time playing up there. I even got to see a night of lake effect snow which was beautiful in itself since I dont ever get to see it at home in Atlanta. I did look like the only idiot around jumping with excitement over what the locals were rolling their eyes at. Its only snow to them. For me, it was a great change from my normalcy. It truly solidified the fact in my mind that I am in a completely different place in the world.

Im back from that trip and ready to spend the week with family, I'll let U know how that goes after I am able to return from my trip. The trip after that should take place in May for IML in Chicago, and Im definitely flying for that trip. As for the room, I decided, new year, new single status, lets have some fun. Im probably going this one alone and not having a roommate. That might change as I look at the prices they are charging, but my privacy might be worth it with the fun I could have, lol. We'll see. I think Im gonna like being single for a while.

Later Guys,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

1/19/08

The word of the month, is "circumstances" and at the end of this post, maybe U will understand why. Im sitting here waiting out what 2 inches of snow on the ground are being villified in the local press as "Atlanta's Snowstorm 2008" and finally updating blog entry as I look at the first page and just realized, wow, its been over a month since I've updated this thing. I actually had to stop and try to remember what the hell I've been doing all this time. And then I remembered as it slowly came back to me. I've been so wrapped up in what I'll call "circumstances" lately that its hard to see the big picture. So I'll do what I can to piece it all together as short as I can. But me and writing in short sentences, dont get along, lol, Im sure U know that by now.

Well, lets see, for those of U that didnt see the first and biggest change in my life since last time I wrote, I'm single again. The marriage has ended to Husbear and since we are still friends, and roomates, he is now dubbed the "Carebear", lol. For details on that, read the previous blog entry, Im not goin thru all that again, there's just too much new stuff to cover, so moving on. What I will say is that its been nothing less than an awkward transition at best, but I think we've both managed to get thru it with as few bumps and misunderstandings as possible. However I do believe that we do have to get thru all of the awkwardness to make this friendship work. And I think in the long run, it will. We will argue, but thats necessary too I think. 10 yrs of crap drudged up is necessary to clear the air. Its worked so far, I'll keep U posted.

As for single life goes, I will adjust, and actually, in some aspects, I do like it, strange as it may be for a while, I'll get used to it. I've had to adjust all my profiles to say that Im NOT looking for anything serious as far as dating is concerned. I probably wont be goin down that road for quite some time. At least a few years. I think the key is to really take the time to get in touch with who I am as a single person again before I even try dating. As for the occasional fling, however, well, whats not to like. When they work, they work. However I am learning that there is also a huge frustration factor involved with men that flake out on actually meeting up for the first time. I forgot how popular that little trait in men seemed to be. I setup 3 public meetings in one night and for one reason or the other, got stood up on all 3. It wasnt like "meet me at x place at x time" or anything like that, but more Im gonna be in this bar on this night, and we all agreed to at least meet in passing, no hard set plans. Well they all ended up not coming out for one reason or the other and over time, that kinda wears on the nerves. One thing I wont stand for is an undependable man, lol, even for sex. But of course, its all part of the learning curve. I've been off the market for quite a while in most aspects, getting back on is not something I'll transition into easily if I have to deal with that kind of BS, lol. Anyway, I digress. Next subject.

As I said before, I've been busy dealing with "circumstances" in my life that have taken precedent over writing here, one of which, in November, I was in a car wreck, which really didnt do too much damage to me, but my car was out of commission for about a week. The hassle with insurance companies is unbelievable. But once that drama was done, then it was the Holidays that tied me down. Sure, it was fun, but visiting family does have its moments that make U want to stand up and run for the nearest window to save yourself. As for the gift giving, my list was always small. But this year, with the breakup, it got a bit smaller. Granted, we did have a good Christmas together, we didnt go too overboard with the gifts like we did on each other every other year. This year it was one big gift, our last to each other, and we spent the holiday making dinner like we always did on holidays. Which was fun. Needless to say, Im glad the holidays are over and done with.

Right after the New Year, I ended up catching what I termed as the super flu. Everybody I knew was getting it and Carebear got it and brought it home to me. Let me tell U, that when it knocks U on your ass, it puts U under the building and literally drops a house on your strength, and your will to live. We were both out of work for a good week before we eventually started feeling better. My boss had it the week before, but I didnt come in contact with him, but we kinda all had the same symptoms. I gagued my progress in the whole thing by Carebear, who was about 2 days in front of me. So when he was at his worst, I was able to brace for mine, and when I saw him get better, I knew there was hope, because for a while there, we both felt like death was in the room, lol. I still have a cough from time to time, but its a drastic improvement from being as low as we both were.

In the middle of being so sick, I still had some business to tend to, so during my brief respit of coughing and wheezing my way thru this flu, I actually had to take a picture for the advertisement of our yearly "Blackout" event hosted by ONYX in October. I gathered up my gear, grabbed my cat, who was needed for the shot, and went out of the house to meet the guys for the photo. Granted, I should have stayed home, but by that time I was so starved for any other human contact and to be out of the house that I would do just about anything, and this seemed like the perfect opportunity. Luckily, nobody caught anything as I kept my distance for as long as I could except just to take the picture and go home. It was good to see daylight again, yes, it was that bad. The unveiling of the pic will be this weekend in the form of a palm card at MAL, short for Mid Atlantic Leather in DC. I wasnt able to make it this year, but to my leather family out there, Im with y'all in spirit, and a 3x5 palm card, lol.

With all that being said, I hope U can understand why its been so hard to sit down and put my mind into writing as so many of U have requested thru the emails. And I do appreciate the emails, but before I can focus, I have to be in the right frame of mind, and so on. I just havent been there lately, but finally bouncing back from whatever "circumstances" have been in play. I hope U can forgive me.

I have some other news to share with U very soon but I'll hold off until I get all the info on how to put it out there. I think U will like this one as I am proud to have been involved in the project.
More to cum, ;)

Stay tuned,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

12/9/07

There is such a very good reason as to why I havent written in a long while, and its because so little time has passed that I really have the opportunity and sit down to have a moment to myself, let alone write. My life is changing by leaps and bounds in so many aspects that its hard for me to keep up with myself. Which is bad. I need to slow down at some point. My last promise to myself lately has been, well, just wait til after the Holidays are over. But that never really happens, now does it? Not with me at least. Come the first of the year, there will be more changes to occur in everyones lives, whether we like it or not. Change is constant. There's my rant for the month, now, on with the stuff U came here for, lol.

I dont know where to begin. It's been such a turmoil of late, partly my fault, partly at the fault of others, but to change your path, make a thoughtful decision to stay your new course, and to have no regrets, well, thats ultimately up to U.

There's really no way to explain this next bit of news but to just come out and say it. So here goes. The Husbear and I have changed our relationship to fit in line with the situation thats been going on for years now and its just time we faced up to it and made it official. We broke up about a month ago, just before Halloween weekend. We have grown apart over the years and just couldnt seem to find our way back to each other after we realized what was happening. I wont get into the gory details of our breakup here, but one thing is for certain, we are at peace with the decision, and are getting along much better because of our honesty in the situation. We are still friends, we're still gonna be roomates for a while, and still hang out with the same group of friends. The only real thing thats changed is how we interract with each other and our bedroom assignments. We care for each other very much, but sometimes the love fades, which is unfortunate, but I never promised to be perfect, and neither did he. So we make our choices and live with them. I think we really lucked out as far as breakups go. No real annimosity towards each other, and I hope it stays that way, of course. We're a lot happier than we've been in years, and we have come to the conclusion that we'll always be in each other's lives in some way or another, so why fight it, or each other? I cant see walking away from 10 yrs with no friendship to show for it. Now of course, Im going thru my own personal period of mourning, I guess. Im not looking for a relationship anytime soon before Im over this one, nor am I looking to fill the void with a quick fuck. I feel like I just need some me time for a good while before I think about anybody else in my life. So thats what I'll be doing. In a way, I kinda summed it up for a friend of mine who I told for the first time last nite when he referred to him as the Husbear. I just said, "Well, based on who we are to each other now, he's not the Husbear but more of the Carebear, lol." seeing as how the love is gone, but we still care for each other as friends. I can live with that.

With that said, one might think that it has been to say the least, a shitty month for me. Well, lets add to the pile of mess I have to crawl out of. Last Friday nite, I was just a mile from home on the interstate when I was rearended, and not in a good way, mind U, from someone rubbernecking another accident on the other side of the freeway. He got me pretty good, but thank goodness I have a good, sturdy car. It did some muffler damage, and slight bumper damage but nothing that couldnt be fixed. I fared ok myself, for the most part, a bit of muscle stiffness from the jolt, but otherwise, Im gonna be just fine. Got my car back today, after being in the shop for just a week. So things are otherwise looking up and getting back to some resemblance of my new version of normalcy.

I really cant wait for this year to be over. Im excited, yet scared to death of the things that the new year holds for me. I havent been single in 10 years, and now, its all different out there. I dont know how to "date" anymore. Thats the scariest part. But I look at it this way. I started this life single, I can do it all over again if I have to. There's nothing to hold me back but my own self. I wont stay down for long, but I will at least take my sweet time to heal. And when Im ready, y'all better watch out, lol. I'll be back with a new view on life and relationships, and sex.

Later guys,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

10/26/07

Hey fellas, Just checking back in with U guys, mainly to do 2 things, one, to let U know that there are new pictures up on the website at BearFilms.com. The pictures have surfaced from my week in the Bahamas shooting "Bears will be Bears". I have to say, Im very proud of these pics, mainly because of the fact that 5 years ago when I decided to get into this "genre" of film and photography, I remember only hoping to get at the very most, a spread in a magazine. Now, looking at these pictures, it reminds me that with the help of some really great opportunities along the way, I was able to get a chance to do a shoot on a tropical island in the Bahamas. Im very grateful for every chance I've gotten to take this dream of mine and play with it a bit and to be able to say that I've done something I've always wanted to do and then some. So, when U see them, think of me and my little dream and just remember, if there's something wild and crazy U have always wanted to do, GO FOR IT!

Now, on with the story, the other reason I'm writing tonite. If U missed any of the first part of this, it would make more sense to U if U read the previous installment dated 10-14-07, just to keep U on the right track. So here goes.

Im picking up after the night of drunkenness that was our Blackout 12 Bar Crawl. I had to be up and ready to work down at the Atlanta Eagle by 9am and was already late getting up. I did what I could to get there and was amazingly only a minute or two late. Im a very time oriented person and being even a minute late when people have plans with me will drive me nuts. Just ask my friend Curtis if U know who he is, lol. He's had to bear the brunt of my attitude for being the person the most likely to be extremely late on anything we do, so for me to be late is unacceptable in my book. Thankfully, even though I was a few minutes late, I was still the first person there, and with no hangover, can U believe it?, lol.

We setup brunch for those who attended Blackout weekend as well as hosted a few other activities for the day until about 5. After that, we had the rest of the evening off until 11 when the Dungeon party kicked off at a rented space here in town. Here, U can basicly get into just about any leather scene that U can think of, or just sit back and watch. The play space was huge, with lots of dimly lit rooms. A sitting area up front was provided for those who just wanted to chill, which is what a good bit of the people did when they first got there, then they would get the nerve up to venture back into the back to see what might turn them on or into the freak they wanted to be. In the room just past the main area, were 2 slings, a bondage table, and further back was the dance floor with fuck benches, and a St. Andrews cross for those more adventurous folk in the crowd.

There were several rules at this private event, check your regular clothes at the door, nudity was allowed and encouraged, but for the most part, people got into the part with their leather gear, so the consensus of the crowd wasnt wearing much more than a jockstrap, harness, boots, leather accompaniments, etc. We have hosted a party like this the year before and stuck by the rules of the club, no selling tickets at the door and it was by invite only. So there was a doorman waiting for U when U checked your clothes to take your ticket. We didnt need any trouble from the law so it was by the book all the way.

Just after midnight, the party got rockin with all the play scenes goin on and people were starting to come out of their shells. There were yelps of pleasure and pain coming from the room with the St. Andrews cross, as one master was whipping his subject into submission. The slings were both occupied at the same time with guys doin their thing, a fisting session, and a dildo play session caught everyone's attention and seemed to be the center of focus for a good while. All was going according to plan, and the party was deemed officially, a success.......when all of a sudden......, the front door opens just a crack by the doorman to see who was joining the party. Im standing in the hallway looking into the sling room from the pane glass observation style windows along with about 10 other guys and have a direct view of what happened next.

The door was pushed further open and all I could see was a parade of flashlights flashing in our direction. It was the cops and they were conducting a raid on the place. I would say that there were at least 10 of them who came in at once quickly and efficiently as if they might have done this before in this very spot. The one I call the Ring leader of the cops is first in and makes a loud announcement. "Well what have we here? It looks like there's some kind of party goin on." With that, from where I was standing, U could see and hear slings clanging in the darkness as their occupents sprung out and tried to regain any composure from the activities that were taking place just seconds before. It was like they had surrounded the place and were planning it all along, and Im sure they were. That club has been raided on several occasions in the past with the police looking for contriband of all sorts. The law of averages was against us tonight, it certainly looked like it was our turn. What was worse about the situation, there were about 30 of us in the club at the time, wearing little more than our jocks, harnesses, or even less. It was unlikely that they would let us reach for our clothes. As far as I was concerned, dont make any sudden moves.

U have a window of time there that was probably no more than 30 to 45 minutes that seemed almost endless. As they searched the place, we heard the cops laughing to themselves as they watched us all, making crude comments under their breaths, and to be honest, it smacked of the raids on the gay bars in NYC not so long ago. U could tell they enjoyed the fact that they were trying to humiliate us. They saw, the slings, the rope, the cross, the half naked men standing around with little other choice but to do just that, stand there, U have quite a lot going thru your mind as U process whats taking place, and what could happen. For all we knew, they could have taken us downtown dressed or undressed just as we were at 3am, cameras from TV crews rolling just outside as they put us in the wagon, splashed us all over the morning, noon, and certainly the evening news, charged as sex offenders for the rest of our lives. People's livelihoods could have been shattered in a second. All they needed was a reason.

The cops wanted to see the license for the party as well as the reciept allowing to hold it there. The guys in the group that planned the party didnt have it, but knew who they could call to get it quick fast, and in a hurry. The owner of the club came down in about 30 minutes and showed him what he needed to see, and in the end, the permit to open the club was not hanging prominently just inside the front door, so they shut us down. They told us to leave, and so did they. I do remember one conversation behind me from a few of us in our group still there as the ring leader left. One of us said, "Yeah, we may as well leave now, its 4am, and our spirit has been broken." and with that, another one in our group quickly corrected him and responded. "Oh no, the party may be over but our spirit will NEVER be broken" and made sure that the ring leader heard it as he got into his squad car and left. We got our things finally, got dressed and did the same.

As I crawled into bed that night next to Husbear, he shuffled around and as usual, he wakes just a little and asks me, "how was your night?" and usually, I'll tell him in detail what went on throughout the night and talk each other to sleep. That night, I was so mentally exhausted and yet strangely high on adrenaline, just left it as, "It was ok, Im glad to be home" and went on to sleep. Of course, the morninig conversation left no stone unturned, lol. I told him everything, and he just looked at me and said, "U know, U really need to stop having such a boring nights on the town". Right then, I knew it was ok.

U can rest assured that the main topic of conversation was about that night during the next evenings closing dinner and awards ceremony. More importantly, what was also remembered was the closing comments as the ring leader left. We seemed to use it as a focus to stay true to ourselves no matter who tried to stop us. I'll always take those things with me and try to pass the story on whenever I can. I figured this would be as good a place as any to start.

Now the awards ceremony at the closing banquet was quite eventful in itself. There were acknowledgements made inducting our newest ONYX chapter in DC, there were awards for Brother of the year for each chapter, as well as other important awards that solidify who we are as a group. Along with those awards, there are more lighthearted awards, such as who traveled the farthest to get here, which in 2 consecutive years has gone to a couple from Seattle, WA. Along with the light hearted awards, one was given to a young brotha who will remain nameless here but he and others with us know who he is and his feats of "Wonder" on that fateful night before. At the precice moment the raid began, he happened to be one of the guys lying in one of the slings having whatever he pleased done to him. Upon hearing the police storming the place, he had only seconds to compose himself and become more "presentable" before they made it back to the sling room, flashlights and all. This certain person leaped up from being flat on his back, landed square on the ground, scrambled between the other mess of men also scrambling around him, was able to seemingly "spin" his clothes on when nobody else around him could find theirs in the dark and was time able to make it to the door in time to greet the police entering the sling room fully dressed! Aah, the stories we told the day after will live in infamy.

There was yet one more award to be given out that night, its been given out year after year, and its called the "Pig of the run" award. This award is given to the individual who comes out of his shell the most and is to say it nicely, the most "friendly" of the weekend. Basicly its the person who was noted for being the most slutty with no regard to discression, but I digress, lol. The person receiving this award gets a nice warm reception from his peers, meaning they have a good laugh at your expense for U being deemed the wildest and sluttiest of them all, so be it. That award, shockingly enough, went to yours truly. I couldnt have been more surprised. But U have to remember, my drunkenness on Friday, caused me to do a lot of things I wouldnt normally do, being the control freak that I am. So the people who chose the award chose me to receive it. And keeping with tradition, it was a gag gift so well thought out that it couldnt have gone to another person but me. As I stood up and graciously took my award in hand, it was a gift bag with a cartoon leather man and leather woman on the outside, and on the inside, was my own giant black sippy cup complete with a huge mushroom head on it very much reminissent of the stripper that I sucked on the bus that night I can barely remember, but hell yeah, I remember that dick, lol.

Anyway, I have to thank U guys for your patience and for sticking with me thru all the wait times in my writings. It really means a lot to me that U do come back and check on me from time to time. And as always, feel free to drop me a line thru the Email link on this site. I love hearing from U.

Dont forget, if U happen to be in town on each first Friday of the month, ONYX Southeast has our monthly Bar Night at the Atlanta Eagle. Each month has a different theme. For November, the month of Thanksgiving, we are asking that U bring in at least one canned food item for donation to a needy family this month. Your donations will be greatly appreciated. The coming month's bar night will take place on Friday Nov. 2nd from 10pm until. See U there.

 

Woof/ Harry Wolfe

 

10/14/07

As people and events come and go in my life, I have come to notice a few constants in this whole scheme of things, and that is that my life just gets wilder and more unpredictable each year. Most people, as they grow older, and maybe this is just the straight world perception I have, maybe not, but arent people supposed to settle down, find a mate and a comfortable chair to sit in and take it easy as the days go by? I know Im nowhere near that concept at only 38, and Im certainly not straight by any means, but isnt something like that supposed to be on my horizon somewhere down the line? The way Im going right now, that answer is a Hell to the Naw! If U look at my life right now and compare it to most straight men and even most gay men my age, they arent putting themselves out there like I am, and they most certainly arent doing porn on the side, lol. But I can also say that if I had a choice, and I think I still do, I wouldnt want to live the ordinary life that everyone else is living. I have my limits, like most everyone else, but I have learned that I am not happy for too long unless I push those limits somehow and make life a little more interesting along the way.

This past weekend, I had yet another old college roomate come into town on business that I hadnt seen in about 18 years. This was one of the guys I had such a mad crush on even when I was supposedly "straight". I think that during my entire time in college, if there was one person I would have "experimented" with, it would have been him. In fact, we came so close to that actual moment in time once that I thought after all these years, he just might have eventually come out. No such luck, however. He ended up marrying the girl he fell in love with while in college and they have a beautiful 4 yr old girl and have been together ever since. Im extremely happy for him and his family, and wish he could have been with us for our big reunion in Charleston a few months back. Maybe next time in DC when we all try to get together again. Seeing him again after so many years brought back a lot of memories and feelings I had so long ago. In fact, I was able to confess to him my true feelings I had for him so long ago, as well as confess a few of the things I had been up to over the most recent years in which U guys are reading about and seeing already, lol. He says he had no idea that I felt that way, but somehow deep down, I know he had some inkling of what he was doing to me. Regardless, it was great to finally get that off my chest as well as to reconnect with an old friend.

Just a week ago today, I was still in the thick of what was ONYX's 12th annual Blackout event, here in Atlanta. We had a wonderful turnout and seeing friends from years before as well as meeting new ones, which was always worth its weight in gold. As being part of the party coordinators and supposedly "working" the event, I kinda slipped up and got a little too drunk during the party bus part of the evening. We had a naked dancer stripping for us between bars we were hitting along the "Bar Crawl" and by the 2nd or 3rd bar, I forget, I was so wasted and my inhibitions were out the window, I ended up getting way too frisky with the dancer, to the tune of actually tipping the guy, who was HOT as hell, then sampling his wares, IN MY MOUTH, on more than one occasion, which shocked everybody on the bus becaue that was NOT me. That was the alcohol talking.

As the night was coming to an end, we ended up at the Eagle, our home bar. I was so gone that in patches of what I can remember, there were 2 people sitting by me outside patting me on the back, and telling me it was going to be ok. I also remember clutching a large plastic trash can that they have in most bars very close to my face for what was almost inevitable. I even had the prevomitory mouth waterings I ended up spitting into the can several times. However, Im not one for throwing up at all if I can help it, and I faught it tooth and nail. The act of doing that unnerves me in the worst way that I will cry before during and after if I go thru with it. I hear people alll the time say that after U do it, it makes U feel so much better, well, thats all fine and dandy for U, but I dont even wanna get to that bridge of feeling better if I have to go thru that, so I faught it and won.

However, I was still too drunk to drive and eventually was taken back to the hotel to sleep it off in the President's suite on the couch. I dont remember how I got there, and most of the night was nothing but patchy as far as remembering anything that went on.

All I had to go on was the reports from the MANY people who told me what I did the next morning, as well as a "drunk text" I sent to my ex boss on the bus somehow during one of the trips to the next bar. Apparently I called him by accident and all he could hear was music and voices. He hung up and texted me saying that maybe I should turn my phone off, and that I accidently called him. The next thing I sent him just sent chills down my spine after reading it in my sent folder on my phone. It read: "oops, drunk on a party bus with a naked man. I just tastd it". I couldnt believe what I was reading, and after calling him to confirm that I did do it, he had me explain everything that went on the night before, Until later that afternoon, I couldnt remember myself. When I drink like that, and its a very RARE occasion that I do, which is probably why it affects me so, I lose bits of time and only get it back in pieces, like flashbacks. Now, before I go on any further, I have to explain that my ex boss is like a "sister" to me. He's a gay man too and we hung out at work more like best friends than boss and employee. So me telling him something like that was nothing to flinch at. However, the fact that I could have called anybody in my phone and probably would have sent the same message, scares the hell out of me. And it should, lol. Miraculously though, I woke up completely refreshed the next morning just 20 minutes before I was supposed to be at the next event, brunch. Normally, if I drink that heavily and get sick or forget things like that, I usually have a hell of a hangover. Somehow, it didnt happen this time. Which was a good thing because I had to help out with several other events throughout the day and on into the evening.

This, going into one of the other big reasons that I have to say my life is getting wilder and wilder with each passing year. I will write about it in my next installment, but make no mistake, U wont want to miss what happened later that nite at the "Dungeon Party". Its something that even my worst fears didn't want to imagine happening, and they almost did. Details to come soon, so stay tuned. And I promise, it wont be another month before I write again.

Bye for now.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

9/14/07

Hey guys, I'm sorry its been so long between posts, but this excuse is a really good one. And the lesson of the story is, Back up your shit! I had to learn this lesson the hardest way of all, and for the past 6 weeks, I've been trying to get my stuff back from literally nowhere. I'll explain. I had the unfortunate task of waking up to a dead hard drive about 6 weeks ago, and absolutely nothing could be recovered. Mind U, I did have some instances of recovery software available, but me, of all people, being a techie by trade, didnt practice what I preached to customers I visited every day. What I should have kept backed up or at least stored on a separate drive, was lost with the one that died. So, all my personal info, pics, music, WEBSITE configurations, EVERYTHING, was just GONE! I about shit a brick when I finished kicking myself and trying to figure out how to recover from this serious blow to everything I owned.

So, with that said, I have been slowly putting the pieces back together and by a strange stroke of luck, was able to retrieve a backup from my website from the web server itself and have finally been able to write again. I'll have more posts in the near future. My apologies again to those who kept coming back and checking on me. They say no news is good news, well, not in this case, its been a bitch.

On with the show. I've been busy the last few weeks doing a few other things other than worrying about my computer situation, which is very good. Work has been kicking my tail in the worst way, staying preoccupied with stuff like that tends to wear U down in every sense of the word. So with a great stroke of luck, I have the day off and can finally catch up with some simple things around the house, pay bills, SLEEP, and actually update my site.
Labor Day weekend was fun here in Atlanta, I got to hang out with a few friends from out of town, one from Chicago, and the other from my home state of KY. Mr. JizzJazz69 himself made a special appearance for the weekend. Had a blast, and cant wait to see U again. ONYX had no less than 3 Bar Nights at the Eagle that weekend, and for the record, I really appreciate the guys that come out and support us. We have so much fun meeting U all there. And dont forget about Blackout 12 coming up in October from the 4th to the 8th, Columbus Day weekend here in Atlanta. Hurry and get your packages while they are still available. For more info, you can go to www.onyxsoutheast.com.

So much has happened over the past 6 weeks I can hardly remember all of it to tell U. But another piece of news is that I was almost set to go back to SF to do another movie in October, but the timing between my job and the shoot dates didnt work out this time. So I might go the next time they shoot towards the beginning of the year. Keep your fingers crossed.

I hope U have gotten your calendars from Bearfilms.com before they run out. I got mine a while back and am very proud of the layout they published. Go thru the link on my site here so I can get credit for sending U there.

Thats all for now, and yes, everything is backed up and I can rest easy again. That mistake wont happen twice, lol.
Til then, drop me a line sometime and look forward to hearing from U soon.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

8/1/07

Aah, to be 18 again, especially at my age, it’s a lot further off than U might think. Well I’ve also heard that U are only as young as U feel. Well, I got a very rare taste of what its like to be 18 all over again, and looking back, I wouldn’t change a thing. I’ll explain. A week ago, I went to a college reunion of sorts. Now this wasn’t any old college-run or organized reunion by any means. This was just a group of us getting together to celebrate the year of our first meeting. I went to college in Charleston, SC back in 1987, culinary arts school. Now ask me or any of the people what they’re doing now and I will be the first to tell U that they are working nowhere near that field anymore. The burnout rate is tremendous in the foodservice industry. Now mind U, I paid my dues there by working in that field since the age of 16, so I got my money’s worth out of the education I got there. So this was a pleasant look back at where we all came from and the people we met along the way.

The weekend was setup by a few of my old roommates and was attended by the small group of people that hung out together during the entire 4 yrs of college. About 13 of us, I’d say mostly guys and like 5 or 6 women pitched in and rented a lake house in Charleston and for the weekend, we’d be holed up there going thru our old yearbooks and telling old tales as well as catching up on who’s doing what, and to whom, depending on who we were talking about, most of the time. At the time we were in college, I’d say about 5 or 6 were gay. The list has since gotten much bigger, myself included, lol. What can I say, some of us took a little longer to blossom, I guess. I was very much in the closet with a girlfriend, also in the reunion group for most of the 4 yrs I was there.
I cant say though that agreeing to go to this gathering over the weekend wouldnt pull out some skeletons in just about everyone's closet. We more than expected what was about to happen when we all got the first email from one of the soon to be attendees:

"LISTEN UP SLUTS I WANT TO KNOW EVERY LITTLE DIRTY AND NAUGHTY THINGS YOU HAVE BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST TWENTY YEARS. SCREW YOUR ACHIEVMENTS I DON'T GIVE A RATS ASS HOW SUCCESSFULL YOU ARE OR WILL BE IN THE FUTURE. I WANT TO KNOW ABOUT THE ONE NIGHT STANDS, WHO FINGERED WHO? AND WHO HAS THE BIGGEST HOLE IN THE SOUTH. BE PREPARED I'M NOT GOING TO HOLD BACK."

Right then, I knew what was on the agenda. We were all gonna have to air our dirty little secrets. Besides, it wouldnt really be much of a reunion if U didnt bare your soul with the people who know U best and can be honest with them as if they are your own family. And thats what we did.
As soon as I got there, most of them were already there, waiting for me, with their pregnantly paused questions. They gave their looks and inuendos as if they already knew my little secret. And knowing the number of gay men in the group, it wasnt hard to figure out that they did know it all. From one account, I heard that one person found this site, and told the others months before this little reunion was to take place. I came prepared to come clean, so to speak, lol.

When the last person arrived, as the rest of us were all sitting around the dining room table, she settled in and then the room got quiet. Strangely enough, all eyes were on me, as if waiting on me to break down and quiver inside myself as the person they remembered so well. The old me would have done that in an instant. But I refused. Im not that shy recluse anymore that was too afraid to stand up for myself, to them of all people. I took the "stand" as it seems, and started my confession with these words.

"I have to admit, there are some things that I have done in my life since knowing U guys that I'm not too proud of. Let me make myself clear right now, that this isnt one of them. I've had a very interesting few years and I have absolutely no regrets. So if U have something negative to say about it, say it and move on to the next subject."

They sat there for a few seconds, and then the questions started coming in. And I answered them openly and honestly with no sign of tremmors in my voice, and they accepted it for what it was and moved on. Sure, I got ribbed all weekend for it, but we were all adults and were able to laugh at everyone's stories as well as mine, because there were plenty of other confessions to go around as well.

The next day, went out to our old dorms and walked the grounds as if it were our first time. It was so creepy to be there 20 years later and see all the changes that have taken place while we were gone. Some went to their old doors, and took pictures in front of them as if they were part of some treasure hunt. Others walked in amazement as they soaked it all in. It was quite the experience. We did a few other fun things as well over the course of the weekend, and finished our last day with a nice Sunday brunch before heading our separate ways.

Leaving them that day, I started on my way back to Atlanta, I couldnt help but cry a little. I felt like I was leaving my family. In a way, they are your family, your new family, the ones you bonded with as your own flesh and blood cut the apron strings and forced U to go out into the world on your own for the first time. In some cases, those are going to be your friends for life. Which is what they have turned into for me. I told them that I could trust them with my life if necessary. And that was the truth, because this weekend proved that no matter how much time had passed, we were able to pick up right where we left off 20 years ago. Polling the crowd at different times throughout the weekend, we all had the feeling that the experience of doing this and getting together made time sorta "stand still" or even reverse back to the time when we were 18 all over again, and that feeling was overwhelming at times. We definitely wont wait another 20 years to do it again. I promise U that.

And now that I have some new viewers checking out the site, thanks to that fateful weekend. I have this message for U: Guys, and Girls, I love each and every one of U with everything I have. This weekend was one of the most memorable in my life, and I am confident U took that feeling home with U as well. I cant wait to do it all over again.

Take care, y'all.

7/11/07

OK, I'll try to piece this all together the best way that I know how, because simply put, my birthday month was a big blurrrrrrrrr. I cant say that the amount of partying I did, and not in the more common and illegal term partying is used nowadays, but the sheer fun of having so many reasons to just get together and celebrate for some reason or another. First off, I celebrated the month with my brother and his wife and now 2 year old, my nephew, coming to stay with me and the Husbear. Now I dont know about U, but Im expecting that the general population that may stop by and read this blog would know first hand about having kids of their own, but being an uncle to a 2 year old anything has its ups and downs.

The ups, being that I can spend time with probably, and I know y'all say this too about your own, one of the cutest babies in the world. This was his first visit to Atlanta so we spent the weekend doing kid stuff, which is fine by me. We did the Aquarium, dinner with family friends, and just spent quality time bonding with the yungun that I dont get to see every so often. The downside to all that, when was the last time U spent with a 2 year old these days? Man, they will run U ragged to the point that U have to ultimately stare your own mortality in the face, starting with the fact that I am NOT as young as I felt before he walked in the door. He was constantly running for things that I thought was going to be child-proofed even at my best attempts. I did not take into account that walking and running at this age included climbing things that when I saw him last, would never be in reach, lol. This did not fare well to my stamina as an uncle by any means.

However, the visit was welcomed with open arms. I got time to spend with family both old and new. It was also the first time that the Husbear was able to see him in person. He doesnt get to go with me every time I head home so him coming down to us was a treat. This, all leading to yet another upside to the downsides I was mentioning before. After all the running, and jumping and chasing and bonding I did with my nephew, my role as an Uncle came to a head when I realized that as ragged as I was from the visit, I got one more treat. The ability to pack him into my brother's minivan, and send them packing back home, lol. Sad as we were to see them go, we were tired as hell, and were ready to get back to some normalcy in our own lives. In fact, after having to watch our words for what seemed an eternity over the weekend because of the parrot in the room which was my nephew who on many occasions repeated new words that we happened to say, none bad, of course, they got in the van, drove off, and the first thing Husbear and I said to each other when we got back in the house was, "Shit! Fart! Damn! Fuck!" as many as we could put into sentences, we were cursing like sailors again, lol. Feels good to have the house back, doesnt it? I asked, he said, "fuck yeah it does". I said back to him, "Sure as fuck does", lol. From there we went to our normal hangout with our friends, had a few drinks, scratch that, a LOT of drinks, and cursed like sailors for the rest of the nite. And it felt GOOOD as FUCK, lol.

That was the first weekend of our June month of celebrations. The second wave to come was the birthday/pool party. In the past, when we lived in the burbs in our own house, we usually invited 30 or 40 people over one weekend and just pack the house to capacity and grill out on the patio like a good house party should be. Now is a bit different. We live in a condo with a communal pool. I couldnt invite everybody I wanted to, so I limited it to a few guests. Husbear had a small list and so did I, but combined, it turned out to be a lot more people than we had really planned. Now in this guest list, there is always inevitably a percentage of people that will say they will come and not show up, and those that will decline during the week as the day gets closer. Not so this time, we had a total of about 26 people that had definitely said they were coming.

We have had several parties there before with 10 to 12 max at the pool combined with the regular people that came to use the pool that lived there at any given time of day and the pool was pretty packed. The number we were seeing confirming gave us both chills. We had one thing on our side, it was Fathers Day weekend. The people that confirmed, showed up for sure, in fact, the number of confirmations to no shows was about 95% acurate. In all 23 people showed up and the pool had no more than 4 or 5 extras from other condos at any given moment. We dodged a bullet with that many people, there could have easily been complaints, lol. But we had a great time and no great fuss at the end of the day.

The week following that was my actual birthday on the 20th. I was given the day off per my boss who thankfully doesnt believe in working on your birthday, gotta love that. So Tuesday, some friends of mine hung out at our normal birthday hangout, the local strip joint here, I call the gay man's version of Chuck E Cheese, had a great time there then just laid around the house after which I was taken to dinner by the Hubby. And on to the weekend, which here, is Pride Weekend!!

For once, it didnt rain this year as opposed to the deluge of storms the same weekend last year and the year before that. On the downside, it was a scorcher of a weekend, the heat was almost unbearable, but I'll take that over the rain anyday. We hung out in the park as long as we could on Saturday without passing out from the heat, ran into a lot of folks that I dont see but once a year, at these events, no doubt, lol. And I wanna send a special shout to the guys that said hey to me in the park that knew me from here. Y'all were so nice. I made a lot of new friends that way, so Im grateful, thank U. At the peak of Pride Weekend, I got to ride in the parade on the Eagle's float. That was a Blast all unto itself. There's no rush like the one Im sure everyone in the parade felt turning the corner of Peachtree and 10th streets rounding out the end of the parade route. The energy was so intense on that one corner it was amazing. I cant describe it any better than that and I was lucky to had been a part of it. Maybe I'll do it next year again, who knows, if so, U know where to find me.

I got my copy of the film I am in sometime during the month entitled "Bears will be Bears" in the mail. I watched it, and yeah, the beach footage I have cried about before on here is indeed gone from the film. Oh well. Im glad to have what they have left on the official release. U can get your copy by going to the Video link on my page. Along with that is the 2008 Bears and Cubs Calendar from BearFilms thats now available. I hope U check that out too. I am Mr. April. I also have a local friend, who goes by Justin Wood, who's also in the calendar. Check him out too.

Well, thats all I have for now, and if U have made it this far without tearing your eyes from your socket from so much reading, congrats. I'll see U next time.

6/5/07

After the long wait, its finally here. My fourth and probably final movie is out, and along with the trials and tribulations that it took to make it out as it was meant to be, it didnt happen as planned. But along with extenuating circumstances, things just happen and we have to take them for what they are. As I reported earlier in a previous post, the producer of the film in the Bahamas I was part of in October, suddenly died in December. As tragic as that was, the film company had the unpleasant task of going thru his apartment in an attempt to reclaim all of the footage of our movie as well as others that were also in the works. Some things made it out, others didnt. Unfortunately, half of my scene which was to be a two parter, either never made it out of the apartment, or is just lost and didnt make it to the movie in time for production. Sadly, it was the only beach footage we had on the entire cruise, which would have made for a very hot setup to the scene that did make it to the film. I was alerted to this possible issue a while back when I was asked to recall if there was any footage of the beach scene that there are pics of in video format. I remember, I was there. But, for what its worth, now, there is some lost footage of myself and KC Shore wandering around somewhere in San Francisco. If U happen to find it, please send it my way, I'd love to see it. In the meantime, What U do see of the movie, I hope U enjoy. The guys really had a fun time making it. The title is "Bears will be Bears" and is available thru the BearFilms site. Check it out. There's even a preview on their site.

I just returned from Chicago for IML and Bear Pride weekend. I had such a great time the whole time I was there that I will probably be back next year. I got to meet so many new friends and old friends its like going to a huge family reunion dressed in black, lol, I love it. In fact, there was so much to do at IML, that I never made it to the host hotel or any of the events for Bear Pride, as much as I wanted to go, there just wasnt enough time in the day. I spent the past week just trying to recover from the whirlwind of a weekend.

This month will be another busy one for both the Husbear and myself. First and foremost is Pride weekend coming at the end of the month. And secondly, my birthday which is always during Pride week. This year its on a Wednesday, the 20th, so the gang and I will be celebrating by the pool this year the Sunday before, nothing too outrageous, just fun with friends. Definitely looking forward to the entire month. And of course, we will be getting our groove on at the local strip joint at some point during that week. I swear, its the gay man's Chucky Cheese if U ask me. The group of friends I go with always love to celebrate birthdays there by enjoying table dances vicariously thru the birthday boy of the month. U all know that a table dance for him is a table dance for us, lol. Dont act like U dont know.

At any rate, Hope U guys have a great Pride weekend if U happen to celebrate it in June.

4/26/07

It seems as though I tend to let things go the older I get. Now I have folks sending me emails telling me to update my page. For that, I thank U. I mean, somebody has to get on my ass to keep me honest, lol. May as well be U. Thanks for that. I swear I have a good reason for the absence, but with summer coming soon and lots to talk about, I'll be here more often. I know, yeah yeah, you'll believe it when U see it. Time will tell.

One of the main reasons I havent been as forthcoming as of late is because I am now part of the working population, and not a day too soon. All that time off was getting to me finally and I had to do something. And believe me, with this job, I hit the ground running on the first day. With my last job, it was such the cushy thing that it was. Spent six years behind a desk all day answering phones and fixing things for people on the other line. U never got to see how the other half lived out on the real front lines. All that changed with this job, and I have the bruises to prove it. First day, I was out at a site, physically lifting things, crawling under desks, configuring systems, and moving things outside in the height of pollen season. I had things hurting on me that I never thought I had. And the day after, I felt like I was hit by two buses, and they were still sitting on my lifeless body. Thank goodness I started on a Friday and had the weekend off. I dont think I would have survived. Granted, with time, I figured out that those situations werent the norm of what the job entailed, but Im learning so much from this experience I'd be a fool to leave without at least 2 or 3 years under my belt. Wish me luck, lol, Im gonna need it.

I have been slowly getting back out there and saving time for me and the Husbear though on the weekends. We've adopted a close knit group of friends to hang out with and we try to do something fun at least once a weekend. A few weeks ago, we went down to one of the local bars and watched the Easter Drag Races. Let your minds wander for those of U who dont know, lol. Its actually pretty fun, they close the parking lot and have all sorts of outdoor games that would make your head spin. I actually decided to enter a competition at the very last second and ended up winning the Hula Hoop contest, who'da thunk, right? I won a bag of porn in a grocery bag and a few other nick nacks, lol. It was all in the fun of it. I almost had to half look in there to see if the joke was on me and they might have given me my own porn, now wouldnt that be sad. I wonder if they did I could get a nice trade in, lol.

I have been also doin my best to stay in some form of good shape now that I have a steady schedule. Its good to get back into a nice routine for a change. Granted I loved being off while I could somewhat afford it, but trust me, when U dont have a schedule, all your good intentions go str8 out the window when U get up at the crack of noon.

I've been hangin out with ONYX on bar nights and last month was a particular blast. Along with taking over the bartending part again, which I missed out on the month before because I wanted a month off from that too. It was good to be back, and was particularly since it was warm, I got a bit crazy and stripped down to a jock and harness and got to kinda emcee the "Best Butt" contest, and it was absolutely no surprise, that a bear won at the Eagle, lol. Ok, act surprised, lol. It was all in fun, and the winner deserved it for sure. Our next bar night is Friday May 4th, so if U are in Atlanta at the time, come on by the Eagle at 10pm for drinks, jello shooters, and our Kinky Carnival. There will be hotdogs, prizes, and certainly other surprises.

On to other news, I have a few very cool things to tell U. If U havent already seen them, Gallery 14 is new with my pics from the BearFilms shoot at IML last year. I decided to put a few out there this month to make up for my slackass writing gaps, lol. Enjoy.

As for the other news, I got word that I will be featured in the new and upcoming BearFilms 2008 Calendar. That came outta nowhere, but was flattered to say the least. 3 calendars in 3 years, who would have ever thunk it, lol. I'll let U know when that comes out and U can get it right here.

The next film release will be in May from what I also understand. the final cutting edits were being performed as of posting this message, so I'll let U know about that when the time comes too. Im probably most excited about this one since its probably gonna be my last film, for a while at least, and the fact that it took me all the way to the Bahamas to do it, is even more priceless in my book. I have said this before, I never thought this experience would take me so far and Im ecstatic to have been able to share it with U in my personal journey thru this site.

Well thats all for now, lets see how long I can stay away this time, lol, probably not too long.

By the way, Im comin to IML and Bear Pride this year, and still looking to room with someone who already has a spot at one of the host hotels. If U know of any serious possibilies, please, send them my way thru the contact link on my page. I'd really appreciate it. Til next time, cya guys.

 

 

3/6/07

The past month has been so much fun I didnt give my page a single thought, now I have to think long and hard just to recap the events. And Im not getting any younger so the memory cells arent firing like they used to. Last month, the Husbear took a page right out my rule of thumb and decided that since his birthday was in February, he would celebrate like I do for mine, the ENTIRE month. All I have to say is thank goodness it was a short month or I'd be in the poor house after another day of celebrating, lol.

We also had, in our group of friends, about 4 or 5 others with the same birth month. So we ended up celebrating the entire month for everybody. Every weekend was a group party that sometimes went on waaay too long but fun nonetheless. Thru that, of course, we made new friends along the way, and for that Im thankful. During our moments of wildness, I got to see or hear way too much of some people in the group, but hey, it wouldnt be wildness if we didnt have that. Long story short, Im spent, physically and financially for a while and cant wait for normalcy to kinda take me back to a quieter time. No more strip clubs for a while.

On the job front, Im still looking, rather half-assed in my desparation, meaning, Im putting my feet out there and getting a few responses from what I have looked into. So when the time comes, I'm confident that when the right job comes along, I'll know when to snatch it up. No offers yet, but a few interviews here and there and of course, waiting on that ever popular second interview.

I've gotten back into the gym routine again after being a slacker for so long. It feels good to kinda bounce back into the shape I remember instead of watching myself just spread on the couch from watching too many soaps, lol. We've decided to cut back to only 3. But anyway, its great to see my shape again. Dont get me wrong, I love my bears, and being somewhat of a cub or otter, (man I hate that term) myself, I love the look, I just dont wanna go too overboard personally. I have a frame set that I feel comfortable with and I was slowly veering off the road from that. There's a point where U have to say, NO MORE, and do something about it.

Speaking of bears, the Bearfilms movie I am in should be out next month from what I am told. I still keep in touch with some of the guys in it as well as the staff. We're all excited to finally see it. I'll of course keep U guys posted as to when I get more info right here. So stay tuned.

Had a great turnout at Bar Night for Onyx Southeast. Lots of surprise guests from Onyx Chicago showed up as we rang in the wee hours of the weekend. Hope y'all made it back safely, and it was great to see U.

Im outta here for now, but thanks for reading, as always, and by all means, stay in touch.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

2/1/07

OK, this is sad. I vow to keep writing here more often so that I dont forget a single thing, and what the hell do I do? I go over a month and nothing. Im sorry. Please forgive me. And its not for reasons that are really that pressing either. I've been unemployed now for the past few moths and granted, the free time I have on my hands would give me a whole lot more time to write here, the fact is, nothing's really happening that you'd really want to hear about, lol. For the first time in a long time, I am officially bored. I sit around and do nothing but keep house, get online to check a few messages, and fall prey to my new obsession. Second Life. I have become so engrossed in the whole thing that I almost spend more time there than in my real life. Case in point, I have a friend, Chester, who now comes to vist me there because I dont spend enough time on my normal aol and yahoo chats to have a decent conversation anymore. To that, Chester, Im sorry. But he also admits, its fun as hell meeting people all over the world as a person U created. But I digress. Check it out sometime at www.secondlife.com, and if U decide to join in, look me up under the name Cyclonius Revolution. Crazy name, aint it? It goes with a private joke associated with two crazy friends of mine, one of which got me started on Second Life. I wont bore U with those details.

Anyway, I also want to say thanks to the guys out there that say hey when U see me and the Husbear out bar hopping. I really appreciated one guy that actually took the time to stop me and reminded me to keep writing because he likes to come here and read. Well this is for U, lol. Im doing absolutely nothing, and loving it.

As I said, though, Im starting to buckle down and actually looking for work in my desired field, so keep your fingers crossed. As for making more porn, Im not really pursuing that as much as I used to. I set out on this adventure years ago to see if I could actually do it. I've proved to myself that I can and have been taken farther than I had ever imagined I'd go. So Im probably gonna lay low on that venue from here on out. If asked to do another one, sure, I'll entertain the thought and maybe even do it, but I wont go looking to do one like before. I've had my fun with it and its time to look into other directions. By the way, there should be two more coming out this year, one this spring for sure, so I'll let U know when they hit the shelves, as usual.

I am grateful for this time off, though. I have been able to spend more time with Husbear than I had been, which is wonderful. I think we have really had a chance to reconnect like I have wanted for a long time. Sometimes a little too much, lol, but thats what bein together 9 yrs does to U. It lets me say things like that, lol.

Having this time off has also given me the chance to reconnect with family back home on a more frequent basis. The ability to jump in the car and go home whenever I wanted for however long I wanted is very freeing as well as comforting. Now, mind U, I didnt say I acted on those whims everytime I got them, they are family, and I can only take so much, lol.

Anyway, for not having much goin on at the moment, I just found out how much I can still write about nothing and fill a good page, lol. As for things coming up, I'll be slingin drinks here in Atlanta on Friday, Feb. 2 at 10pm at the Atlanta Eagle for ONYX SE's Bar Night. Come meet the gang if U happen to be in town and have a drink or two while you're there. I'll keep U informed of the job situation as it happens.

Luv y'all,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

12-20-06

I certainly hope that U all have at least started your Christmas shopping or better yet, finished it. As of today, Im completely done with it and only have to wait for the big day to arrive and quickly leave so I can get on with life. I know some of U all are already stressed out beyond your own personal breaking points, but for the first time, Im done early. Yes, Im a procrastinator, with being unemployed, comes a lot of extra free time U once had no idea where your next free moment would come from. So for that Im thankful this year that Im ahead of the big Christmas game. To the rest of U, good luck, because you'll probably need it.

As promised, I am gonna try to continue to write on a more regular basis. The distance between the last two entries were entirely too long. So, here we go. Im not too sure where Im gonna go with this one still, I had so much ground to cover and with my mood being the way it was, I just poured out what I felt like at the time and just left it at that. So I'll just start somewhere. How bout this?

For starters, last month marked my 9th year with the Husbear. What did we do to celebrate? Absolutely nothing. Not that we didnt want to or anything like that. We both agreed that although 9 yrs in any marriage str8 or otherwise is cause to celebrate, we'll hold off on the streamers and noise makers for the big 10, should we make it. I think we'll have a blowout celebration with all our friends, even those who said we wouldnt make it, and U know who U are. My running joke with people who we tell that we've been together for 9 yrs is that Im up for parole in 1, so wish me luck, lol. Actually, we spent the day with each other, as it should be. No flare, no big bang, just us. Im fine with that. So thats one topic out of the way, not sure what else to touch on. Oh yeah, I know.

Im not sure if U guys remember or not but a few months ago, I had the big eye infection that kept me out of work for 2 days because I was stupid enough to sit and let my contacts rot in my head too long and caused my eyes to develop two big corneal abrasions. I swore, number one, that I would never do that again, and two, when I found the time, I would finally bite the bullet and get lasik surgery. Well, that day was 10 days ago, and Im so glad I did it. For those of U who have already gone thru it, U know what Im talking about when I say, "Damn, I was a nervous wreck" during the procedure. The thought of adding drops to my own eyes really gets to me, and how I put contacts in my eyes for so many years, I just dont know how I did it. Now comes the thought of someone holding your eye in place while they slice your cornea while U watch the whole procedure first hand isnt my way to spend any Tuesday morning. But its really not as bad as I thought it would be. I just took my happy pills they offered me, and lied PERFECTLY still. It took all of 5 minutes per eye and once I was done, I could see better than I had in years. I was driven home and went str8 to bed as they suggested, and slept for all of 2 days, on and off, of course, but after that first day, I woke up and could see the clock, well that made it all worth it. If you're thinking about getting it done, I say do it. U will get a wakeup call your eyes have been begging for. Ok, thats another one, what else. I know, this.

During my time off between jobs, I've been spending quite a bit more time online but not really in this world. I've found my Second Life, literally. If U are into any online games where U interract with other people, then U havent seen anything til U have seen your Second Life. Its free, U can log on and become anyone or anything U want, person or animal, and live an alternate life. U go thru worlds that other players have created and interract with them by chatting with whats called your avatar, or person. This game is ADDICTIVE by any stretch of the imagination. I dont know how else to put it. The realism, yes, I know, in a virtual environment, can only go so far. But my avatar has been shopping, gone to the beach, gay dance clubs and even had lots and lots of sex, and Im not talking virtual stick people sex. To watch these things have sex will blow your collective minds. I have never seen anything so pretend look so real. And I have to say to those sick fuckers that made this whole thing up, Thank U, lol. I have already gotten a few of my ONYX brothers hooked on it and one has even gotten married in his Second Life to another avatar. Pretty amazing, but people do take their second lives that seriously. Dont believe me, try it out yourself at Second Life. And if U do, look me up and let me know U made it. But I wont be under this name or even my real name. My second life name is Cyclonius Revolution. Kinky, yeah, I know, lol. I made the first name up in honor of a private joke I have with my friend from KY, JizzJazz69, who also tuned me into Second Life in the first place. The last name is chosen from a long list of obscurities that U wouldnt really think of as a last name, so have fun at it. Come say hi to me in Second Life.

Speaking of my ONYX brothers, I posted some of our pics from the last Bar Night of the year in which we held our Kinky Christmas party and raised money by having guests of the bar take pictures with Kinky Santa and his Naughty Elves, which I was one, again this year. There were even 2 Mrs. Clauses. Check em all out in Gallery 13. We had a blast.

Wow, for someone without much organization, I think I put up quite a list of things I had left off the previous entry. So I'll leave it at that for now, and I hope U guys have a great holiday and please be safe. Happy Holidays from the Husbear and myself to all those that I chat with on a regular basis, and those who I dont, but feel the urge to say hey everynowandthen. I really do miss chatting with U all and I'll get back online more often than I have been, or better yet, check me out in Second Life under the name of Cyclonius Revolution. I'm gonna be pleasantly surprised at who actually does. Cya for now.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

12-9-06

Ya know, I have to tell U, that I really hate coming here to write when I take such a long time off from writing in the first place. And just who's fault is that? Well untimately it falls on me, but Im gonna throw a little of the blame on random circumstances that creep up in my life as well as everyone's life. Good things, bad things, and things that we just have absolutely no control over whatsoever. Lately, I've been plagued with a little of all of them at some time or another. But as the saying goes, thats life and death as we know it.

Speaking of which, I cant really continue this without stopping to pause for the sudden passing of a recently new friend of mine, pornstar and BearFilms producer, Andy Dill. He passed away on Wednesday, Dec. 6th and will be missed by so many. He was the one who actually tapped me on the shoulder to go on the Bear Voyage cruise this year and allowed me to meet and work with so many wonderful people on trip. If U remember from my last posting, he's one of the guys who helped me get past my fear of dark water. That meant a lot to me that he would hold my hand and help a stranger like that. And what a pleasure to work with. He will be truly missed..

So many of U have emailed me wanting to know about the rest of the trip. How was the actual "working" part of the trip? Were there any obstacles? Well, to put it mildly, Hell yes, there were obstacles, lol. We all faced them. Firstly, we were all flown down to Orlando to attend BearBust which was a blast in itself. So many bears that weekend. My first and hopefully not my last Bear run.

The ship was massive, from one end to the other, there was no way to see all the way down the halls. We were sequestered to one floor mainly, the 9th deck. At first, U could tell where U were because of all of the "things" put out on the magnetic doors to the cabins. It looked like a gay dorm hall in college. There were things such as magnetic letters on the doors spelling all sorts of sordid phrases left by the occupants, and of course, each passer by would change the letters and leave their own message along the way. Then there was the door with all the Barbie and Ken dolls with whatever dressup hair strategically placed. It was hilarious for a while, then the crew of the ship cracked down and made them take them all down. By the time our week was up, it looked like any other cabin on any other cruise ship. Sad, but ok. There were certainly other things to focus on, besides, some of us are on a working trip.

My roomates, BearFilms' own KC Shore and Bo Tucker and I became fast friends from the begging even from BearBust. We lucked out and got one of the largest rooms on that floor. It was a royal suite with 2 bedrooms and the huge balcony I have in my gallery. Oh yeah, I have pics from the trip in Gallery 12 this time. Check em out.

As we all made friends with each other, and bonds were fused, we remembered that we all had a job to do. That Monday, we set out on one of the islands in the Bahamas for what was supposed to be a private photo shoot and maybe even get some video shots out of the way. We posted one watch on either end of the path we decided to scout out for what turned out to be some really great pics. KC and Bo also went and got a set of stills out of the way as well. Leif Gobo and I found a cool spot to start shooting while the others went with Andy for their shoots. The problem with that situation is that the island was NOT as private as we had hoped. The island was crawling with tourists from the ship and as small as the island was to begin with, there was little to no privacy when it came time to do our shoots. So here we are, with our pants down to our ankles if not completely off posing in the brush when we get a signal on the radio that someone was coming up the trail. The routine was to just stop what U were doing, put your pants back on, and wait til they pass. Well as sly as we tried to be about the whole thing, its a little obvious to the gaggle of old lady tourists, what we were doing when they walk by and see a man holding a big camera, reflectors, and other equipment next to a guy with no shirt trying to look inconspicuous being way out in the bushes. All the while, we, the models were supposed to be able to get it "up" take a few shots, and then put your clothes back on, scurry out of the path, then go back and do it all over again, oh yeah, U have to get it up again, did I mention that, lol. At one point, as one group of tourists walk by, Leif starts nonchalantly looking at some leaves in the other direction as Im stooping in the bushes with my swim shorts on. As they pass me, I decide, in a state of panic, that I wasnt doing a good job of looking innocent enough, grab a stick, and start digging in the dirt as if I'd been looking for something, lol. Now my idea of a photo shoot did not entail portraying Umbutu the cave dweller in the brush digging for worms in order to hide what we were really doing there, but thats exactly what it turned into at one point, lol. I was embarrassed as hell at the time, but we all had similar stories to laugh about when we got back on the ship. All in all, it was a great set of pics from each of us, and U will eventually see them on the BearFilms site at one point or another.

Now U might think that the photo shoot was the hardest part of that day, well think again. We had finished up in time to do some of our video footage while still on the island. So my scene partner, KC and I went with Andy and Leif further into the island to a hopefully much more secluded area to work. Once again, we had our spotters placed so we could get some sort of warning of imposing visitors. We got warmed up and started our scene, just a little BJ action, nothin too heavy for our first day. Well, once again, the tourists started coming out of the woodwork. Some were in the form of passers by on the path, an occasional curious bear that I swear knew what we were up to and wanted to get a quick peek in for himself. Others were just passing by along the beach which was seen in our backdrop of our scene. And others were in the form of snorkellers out in the ocean but close enough to spot us if they wanted to. Our spotters did what they could to warn us in advance so we could stop, put our clothes back on, and play Umbutu again, oh yeah, when they were gone, start over again where we were, and not to mention, "get it up" again. That took some real work, considering that sometimes the guests we were encountering made it past the lookouts and we had to scramble a little faster at times to recompose ourselves, very shakily and haphazzardly I might add. Well the icing on the cake for me came when during one of our many "get it back up" moments, Im sitting in the brush under a tree, jacking away, naked and sweaty between the shore line and the camera just behind me, another round of guests happened to make it past our defense line.

This time it wasnt just another ordinary group of walking guests, though. They were in the form of a group of what I called at the time, Kayakers from Christ, lol, because what happened next would embarrass the wildest person I know. Well to continue, Im sitting there fluffing myself up when I look up and see the fleet of 8-10 yellow kayaks coming not past the scene, but straight for it. They were looking like they were coming to shore and pretty damn quick if U asked me. I looked around for the spotter in charge, and he wasnt where he was supposed to be, but standing just a few feet in front of me. No wonder he couldnt see them. So Im getting frustrated at all the start/stop moments we were having as it is and as hard as it is to concentrate, my spotter walks up, and instead of helping to shield me, goes, "Whats taking so long?" Not exactly the first thing I would want to hear when trying to concentrate on performing. I looked up at him, still not moving from my spot and still acutely aware of impending discovery by the kayakers coming towards the shore. I said, in a paniced voice, "Uh, do U see these guys coming right for us? How did they get past U in the first place? I should be gone by now!" He didnt have an excuse and I didnt really care to hear one at the moment. My main concern was getting the hell out of there with what bit of dignity one could shred up at being found lying naked in bushes with a huge camera pointed at U. So I said, "just stand in front of me while I get my pants on", which were right around my ankles at the time. Thinking back, all I had to do was pull them up while he stood there, but did I do that? NOOOOO! I had barely enough cover from the guy standing in front of me, the fleet of kayakers were no less than 50 feet from me already on the shore, mere tourists! And what did I do in my state of sheer panic? I stood right up, buck naked, half hard, and flashed them all as I pulled my pants up and scurried away down the path like a scared elf. By that time, the others had already packed up and had left my naked ass right there. As I made it to them, Andy, who's still rolling, is taking candid interviews from the other guys as to how their experince is so far, lol. Well unknown to me, I didnt know that he was taking light footage and comments at the time. He points the camera to me and says "Harry Wolfe, any idea why we're wrapping up early today?" I hadnt come down from my adrenaline rush of fleeing the scene looked at him with this 'are U crazy' look on my face, looked right at the camera and said something to the tune of "Did U not just see those crazy kayakers from Christ barreling in on us?" I cant remember what I said word for word, but thats what I was feeling at the time, but I think I had a meltdown on film at that point, but again, something to laugh about later when we were all out of the situation at hand. We laughed pretty hard as a matter of fact once it was all over and done with. Who knows, that might even make it to the extended footage, lol, Man I hope not. And THAT is the reason that it was so much work.

There were other scenes like that throughout the week, but we all made it thru unscathed. Some scenes took 4 hrs to do, others took 6 hours to do and now I know why. The more men in front of the camera to do a scene, the longer it takes to get them all "up" at the same time. Its really harder than it looks to get that 20 minute scene which is the end result of what U see when it finally comes out. I've learned that time and time again now. Fun work can be just that, work, when it all comes down to it. My hat's off to the guys that do it fulltime.

At the end of the week, and our last scenes were shot, KC, Bo and I treated ourselves to one of the nicest restaurants on the ship. Just the 3 of us. We sat there, realized that after all we had gone thru in that short week, it was over tomorrow. I cant tell U who started first, but anyone looking at that table would have thought something was terribly wrong, and it was. Our happy family was breaking up and we were 3 grown men, bawling our eyes out over the releif that it was all over but we wouldnt be together after tomorrow. Our dear friend Jerry, aka, Man-Ma, who's also one of the BearFilms managers, came over to see what was wrong, and then there were 4 men gushing at the table. To think about it, its really sad to be in such a top of the line steak restaurant and not be able to see or taste the beautiful steak in front of U because of the taste of tears and snot getting in the way. What a waste, lol. Yes, we were crying that hard. I had made friends on that trip that I will know for the rest of my life. However long or short that may be, judging from the experience of losing Andy so soon after. I called KC and Bo yesterday and had the displeasure of breaking the news to them after Leif told me. We promised to have a drink for Andy this weekend, no matter where we were. So this is my pause, in memory of Andy Dill. May U look down on us and smile from time to time. And please, no more candid interviews. I dont know if I could take another one like that, lol.

I swear I had so much more to write this time around, but Im tired and my fingers hurt, and looking at what I just wrote, you're probably already asleep. So I'll save that for next week. And I promise, it will be next week. Im getting back on the wagon I've fallen off so many times before and let this website slide. I've got plenty to talk about and I hope U will stick by and let me vent from time to time. I could use a little cheering up lately. Im feeling like thats the problem with having so many friends, eventually they will leave U in one way or another, as I've had to deal with a lot in my own personal family life lately. But I do know that death is a fact of life, there's no getting around it, and as I am reminded constantly by two other close friends of mine, Life is short, live it to the fullest. And I do cherish each and every one of my friends and family as if today is the last day.

Talk to U soon, see U in a week.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

11-1-06

Greetings, Gents, and the occasional lady that may wander by. Im back from my trip to the Bahamas shooting a movie for Bearfilms.com that should be out sometime in April. We had a great time and during the next few weeks, I'll be writing about the many experiences and the new friends I was lucky enough to make while on the trip. In the meantime, as promised, I have added another gallery to the mix. Gallery 11 is new with pictures from Blackout 11 held this past October here in Atlanta. I got to meet a lot of new friends there as well. In hindsight, October was a pretty spectacular month for me. I will never forget the experiences I have had the opportunity to share with so many wonderful people. I will post pics in Gallery 12 from the cruise soon as well. One step at a time though, and eventually I'll catch up, so check em out when U get a free moment, and as always, check back as this site is ever changing.

I have to start this one out with all the wonderful suggestions I recieved on my fear of "dark water". I was kinda surprised at the fact that people had things to offer to try and remedy this situation that was going on in my head. In the end, it was a matter of me actually going thru with it and facing my fears head on, or in my case, as luck would have it, from the rear. Dont worry, I'll explain, lol.

The cruise, overall, was an absolute success. I cant say I have met a nicer group of people in my life. There were bears from all over the country and some from even further out than that. I can honestly say that I have made some new lifelong friends from this trip. I'll explain more about the cruise and my "mission" on the boat at a later date. In the meantime, the water.

The way the room I was assigned to was set up was nothing short of spectacular. Three of us, meaning the BearFilms models lucky enough to get this room were put up in a royal suite overlooking the dead rear of the ship. So anytime, day or night, that we were at sea, our view was a vast open space of where we've been. The roomates I was assigned to room with were KC Shore, and Bo Tucker. U can find them both on the BearFilms.com site under the list of many models featured on the site. These two, amongst others, I bonded with the most, and ultimately, helped me get over this irrational fear of the water I was having.

So to take it head on, I waited for the sun to go down. By that time, we had already set sail down to the Carribean, so everybody was getting used to the first new environment, the motion of the ship moving. My first concern was sea sickness, but thankfully I didnt have any to speak of. So on to the next task, familiarizing myself with my new view, of nothing.

Two new friends I was getting acquainted with, Andy Dill and Leif Gobo, came down to check out the room for themselves, and after showing them around, they went out on the patio and chatted about the schedule we were going to be on while filming, the place I was most dreading was starting to get its first guests at night. I had mentioned to them about my fear earlier that day so they knew what I was going thru. They saw that I would only go as far as the patio door and invited me to come out and hang with them. I hesitated a bit before taking a few steps onto the deck. Now the deck is huge but in my own little world, it was the smallest ledge I could find without falling off the face of the earth as far as I was concerned. I looked out and found nothing but blackness in front of me, coupled with the noise of the wake in the ocean trailing us. After a few more minutes, it didnt seem as terrible as I had pictured it to be. And thank U Andy and Leif for not leaving my side once while I was out there because talking to them calmed my nerves more than they will ever know. As I saw it, any sudden move would have triggered a panic attack like they had never seen. I sat down and continued to chat with them and after about 20 minutes, I kinda forgot where I was, totally immersed in conversation over trivial things. I had to almost remember what I was so frightened about.

After that, we went back inside and I was actually very proud of myself for what I had overcome that night. And I had them to thank for helping me thru it. I had one more test to do before the night was over, so after they left the suite, I stood there for a moment or two, gathered my strength, and turned out all the lights, and slowly walked to the patio door again, in complete darkness. The only lights that were visible were a few patio lights from my neighbors to the left of me. The rest was pitch black. I slowly walked back to the railing and held on while I concentrated on staying out there as long as I could. And I did it, I finally did it. I was over my fear for good!!! Or so I thought.

The next night or so around 10pm, KC and I walked out to the lower deck of the ship and decided to head up to the furthmost front of the ship. Which should have been fine, considering my new found strength. The wind from that part of the ship was considerably different. It howled with an almost deafening force I hadnt heard, ever. KC was running toward the front as I tried to catch up, He kinda disappeared as I lost him in the darkness. The lights that were kind of protecting me were dimming as we went further and further, and I slowed my pace to a near crawl as his voice got fainter and fainter as he ran to the darkness. At the time, the only thing I could hear was the roaring wind, and another element, the water crashing onto the side of the boat. It was nothing like the peaceful water I heard the night before.

This was completely different. This was the water I remembered so long ago. Knowing that KC was just ahead, I slowly walked further into the darkness and all the while, the waves were seemingly louder and the wind whipped thru the hallway to a corridor that led to the heliport, the dead front of the ship. I staggered up the stairs as I could barely see KC just ahead of me, and by this time, I was scared shitless and noticed that I wasnt breathing. My body had tensed up so much that I forgot to breathe. Now THIS was the terror I remembered all too well. KC took my hand and we walked into the darkness and sat on the benches as the wind came at us head on. With KC being the free spirit he is, embraced the experience and did his "King of the world" moment facing the darkness as I sat clutching my bench for dear life. He did point out one thing, that the stars were beautiful there, and that there were so many of them to see without the glare of city lights anywhere around. I did notice that for myself, and the view above was magnificent. I will never forget it. I thank him for dragging me up there to see it, no matter how scared I was. It was beautiful. There seemed to be billions of stars out that night available to the naked eye and I was given the opportunity to see something that I never get to see on any stretch of a regular basis. I was thankful for that and it calmed me down momentarily enough to enjoy it. With him, I was safe, and I let go of the death grip I was putting on my bench and sat to take in the stars.

We eventually came down back to the safety of the lights inside the ship, and I thanked him for being so understanding. We really got to bond that night. I appreciated his time he took to show me that. In all reality, he would have gone up there with or without me to see that, so I got to tag along, but I was grateful nonetheless. So my next test was to do it the next night, alone. U know I gotta do it for myself at least once, like the night in the cabin. So the next evening, I set out to the front deck, by myself. To make a long story short, I only got as far as the steps to the heliport, and it was closed off since it was past midnight, thankfully. Because that night, I dont think I would have really made it. The wind and waves got to me and I couldnt really take it as much standing there alone with me, the water, the wind, and the darkness all taunting me. So I cut my losses and ran back inside. But hey, I at least made great progress in facing one of my biggest fears. Maybe next cruise I'll do it and not even have to think about it. I know thats not true, but baby steps is the first step to getting over it. Never let your fears stop U from doing something U want to do. Im not over it yet, but I know in time I will completely get over this.

I will write about the rest of the trip and working on the film soon, Im tired now, but I wanted to get this out there since there were so many concerned emails regarding this part of my trip. Thank U for that.

I also wanted to send a shout out to my best buddies, Kelvin and Curtis. They read this blog and wondered why I never mention them in any of this, so here it is, your shout out. This is for U, Bitches, lol.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

10-10-06

Can one honestly say that they don’t have enough energy to drop dead? I think I can at this point. But what a way to go, lol.
I can honestly say that I had a blast this weekend during ONYX's Blackout 11 here in Atlanta that I cant wait for the next one. I havent been this tired from helping to host a party weekend in years. I will say this though, I couldn’t be more proud to say that I am affiliated with the Southeast Chapter of ONYX than I am now. Everything was a success from Friday nite's Registration Meet'n'Greet and Bar Crawl, from the Saturday Brunch, cookout, and Grown and Sexy party, to the Banquet and Dance on Sunday. The caliber of people in the black leather community astounded me. So much history and personality in the room all at once. It was a wonderful sight to see. And to all those out there that I met this weekend, thank U so much for your support. I really appreciate the hospitality U showed me as well. I feel like my family has grown by leaps and bounds over this past weekend.

To be exact, ONYX inducted it's first female members, the ONYX Pearls to the fold. I can see nothing but great things coming from them, so watch out. My only regret was that the Husbear wasn’t there to share in the festivities with me. He had to go home unexpectedly to tend to family matters. But there's always next year. The awards ceremony was awe inspiring. I felt so proud to be even a part of what went on there. I actually won two awards, the Certificate of Appreciation and the Presidential Champion award. If U werent there this year, then U must make plans to be there next year. For more information, please check out www.onyxmen.com

Now that this party is over with, I am on to an even bigger party at sea, as I head to Orlando, FL for the big Bear Bust party this weekend. I'll be traveling with the BearFilms crew beginning there and off to the Bahamas for fun in the sun and of course, sex on tropical islands, lol.

Speaking of which, I really appreciate the responses I have been getting from U guys regarding the big phobia I described in the previous post. I got a lot of really good suggestions that I'll try. Either way, Im gonna face my fears head on or lose my head in the process. Hopefully, I'll have a happy story to tell regarding that issue. We'll know by the end of the first night, lol. Wish me luck. I wish I could almost bring my bass along just to keep me company. That usually helpe calm me down. Im getting pretty good at it now and the more I learn, the more I wanna play. But since I cant, I'll have to find another way to keep my eyes off the dark, mysterious water, lol. I'll let ya know how it goes in about a week, in the meantime, Bon Voyage, er… Bear Voyage.

Oh, and by the way, I just found out the solo shots I did at IML with BearFilms is now being featured. Check em out if U get a chance.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

10-3-06

First off, sorry for the delay in writing, but its been one hell of a month, both good and bad. As for the good, I wanna say thanks to everybody that I met Labor Day Weekend. It was a true blast getting to know U guys. Bar night with Onyx was a total success and we're looking forward to seeing U all at Blackout 11 this year. I cant wait to see how it all turns out with so many planning this event. We have a lot of activities planned for U and pardon the cliché' but I can honestly say its gearing up to be the best year ever. That was the good.

Now for the bad. I have been informed about a week ago that after 6 yrs at my job, on my anniversary date, no lie, that I will be laid off in just a few short weeks. Now I knew that was gonna happen sooner or later, but had I known it would be on my anniversary date, I would have at least made her squirm about having to do it. They call us in individually to tell us, and I knew it would happen on that day, but what I should have started doing all the talking, like, "Wow! U remembered my anniversary? How nice of U. I had no idea that U even did anything for 6 years, Im so touched!", lol. That would have been just great to watch her sweat as she had to drop the bomb on me. But I didn’t realize it til after the fact, so, oh well, another anniversary, another layoff, I'll try to pull that one out. As it turns out, my last day at my job will be the day before my big trip.

And now comes the UGLY! I'm just about ready for my first cruise ever, with one major setback I am gonna have to face head on, simply because I didn’t think of it before I booked the trip: I'm afraid of large bodies of water at night. Don’t ask me why, but maybe someone else has this thing of what I might have to consider a rare phobia. I cant seem to find any description of it on the web. I mean, I can find phobias on water, and I can find phobias on the night, but both combined, it seems as if its unheard of. So, please tell me how to get over it if U know how. I'd love to hear from anybody out there that may have this crazy thing in their head about the "evil black sea at night". For some reason, and this is the only way I can explain it, is that hearing water all around me and seeing nothing in front of me causes my mind to play tricks on me. I get this fear that Im going to step in the wrong direction and fall right off into this huge, dark abyss or something. I just don’t get it. It doesn’t make sense because I can swim in my pool at home at night with no problem. It has a single light in the side of the pool, but that’s it. No big deal. Its crazy.

My earliest recollection of this came when I was in college. I went to school in Charleston SC, and being from a place so far inland, KY had no beaches close by. So the whole thing of living on the shore was completely new to me. So I had wanted to experience it all. Earlier in the week, I had said that one Saturday morning, I would arrange to drive down to the beach before sunrise and watch the sun come up over the horizon with some friends. Well, that Saturday, I got up, all set to do it. As it turned out, my friends had all backed out. That didn’t stop me from my goal. I wanted to see the sunrise, and I wanted to see it TODAY. So off I went by myself. It was a 30 minute drive to the beach I had gone to plenty of times during the day but never at night. The road eventually skirts the shore by about 100 or so feet from the water as U ride alongside for several miles before U get to the place we always used to park. It a trip I had taken lots of times, even by myself but never at night. The sun had not risen yet so it was pitch black still, but I had the music playing in my car, and I didn’t have a care in the world. I found my spot and I parked with the car facing the ocean. Not another soul was in sight at 5am on this stretch of beach.

The excitement started when I turned off the car, and sat there in the total darkness. I couldn’t see anything in front of me at all. It was pitch black, and what was worse was the fact that I could hear the ocean, but couldn’t see it. I felt a wave of terror grip me like nothing I had ever felt. I felt like the ocean was all around me and there was no way out. I was so frozen with fear that I couldn’t even get out of my car. I tried to get a hold of myself to figure out what was wrong but my mind was racing just way too fast and my heart was clearly audible in my head and the only thing louder than that was the sound of the waves all around me. Keep in mind that I was no less than 100 feet from the shore on a paved lot before U even get to the sand, and I was paralyzed. I got my wits back after several attempts to focus on starting the car, turning on the radio again, loud, and getting the hell outta there. I never forgot about that night but I have no idea how that combination spooked me so badly. There were no past histories of any childhood accidents or trauma happening on water or even at night that would cause me to focus on this in such a way.
Its still a mystery to me as to how or why, but being away from the ocean for 18 yrs now since college, U tend to forget these things buried in your mind.

I never went back to the beach at night even with other people my entire time at college. I did actually have to relive that a few years back when I went to St. Simons Island off the coast of GA with some close friends of mine. We had dinner that night at a restaurant on the beach and they all decided to walk along the beach. I didn’t even think about the fact that I was about to go out there or what might happen until I went out with them. Everything was fine, U could see the restaurant lights in the distance along with some flood lights guiding a path to the beach. The waves were coming in and I could hear the water getting closer. The others were talking amongst themselves as they all walked. I kinda found myself lagging behind while still trying to join in the conversation. For some reason, I didn’t notice that it was getting darker as we left the restaurant property. And then I noticed that the conversation I was hearing was getting fainter and fainter, but the water was getting louder and louder. By the time I had realized what was happening, it was too late. As it turned out, I had stopped walking and the others didn’t notice it and kept walking further and talking. All I could hear was the ocean in my head and the blackness in front of me was for lack of a better word, blinding. The only way I can describe it is like in the movie "Poltergeist" where the mother is trying to get her children from their room for the 2nd time after the house goes into full psycho mode, she runs up the stairs and hits the end of the hallway, she sees the children's room, they show her point of view as the door at the end of the hallway getting further and further away and as if the walls are closing in on her. That’s exactly how I felt. My friends finally noticed that I had stopped just a few yards behind them and got me. I wasn’t able to finish the walk and I waited back at the restaurant. Is that strange or what? I don’t know what it is that comes over me but when it hits, its intense and only to me. And of course after years of not being on the ocean, I put it out of my head, I go on with life, and for a vacation this year, decide to take my first cruise. And the strangest thing to this logic is this: When did I remember this little tidbit of info about the sea and me? Just about a week ago.

Yeah, that’s right, Im a silly bitch for doing it in the first place. Its something I havent had to face in at least a few years, but I was telling someone at work about going on the cruise who had already been on one several times and listening to his conversation was fine and I was getting more excited about being there on the boat, the open air, the color of the water, the waves, and then the conversation changed. He didn’t know it but he mentioned the sea air at night, and started talking about how peaceful it is hearing the waves at night if U have a room with a window, or walk the deck at night, the motion of the ocean all around U. He stopped his conversation when he noticed that I was standing with my back against the wall, beads of sweat popping on my bald head, and Im breathing heavily, clutching the corner of the cube for dear life. I actually had to regroup and sit down. I really hope this isnt going to be much of a problem in the next few weeks, but somehow, I don’t think Im gonna get my wish unless I at least try to face it head on. Im not going to back out of it for any reason. And a week at sea will either do one of two things, cure me of it, or cause me to go completely mad by the first night. And yes, my palms are sweating like crazy just from typing this. And to make matters more complicated, Im filming the next movie I'll be in on this trip. Yeah, didn’t see that one comin, did ya, lol. I have no doubt I'll be fine during the day, but lets just hope for no night filming. I don’t think there will be, lol. So if U happen to be going on the Bear Voyage cruise this year and U see me stuck to a wall past sundown, kindly pry me from or take with, whatever I have a death grip on and bring me inside, lol. I'll owe ya one;)

8/30/06

Its funny how U look up and over a month has passed without an update here. Im gonna have to get on that guy that writes this stuff, oh yeah, its me. Oops. So much, yet absolutely nothing at the same time is going on that this blog started to play 3rd fiddle to my priorities, which means I do have a life, but I will try to pay more attention to keeping U guys updated for those of U still interested. With that said, lets see. Whats new, hmm.

Well, most recently, I've just gone thru my second colonoscopy in 3 yrs. Since colon cancer runs in my family, I have to be very cautious and aware, so I have to get tested every 3 years. And for those of U that don’t know what one is yet, here it is, and for U power bottom exhibitionists out there, don’t get too excited just yet. U get a thin, 6 foot webcam shoved up your ass that takes pictures and video all the way up your large intestine, makes that big curve and continues to where it meets your small intestines, all the while, shooting air into you to expand the track as it goes, snaps another picture and comes back out while at the same time, U get the pleasure/displeasure of watching it track its way up and down your tract on the screen they have U facing, really its for the doctors to see. Its all for a good cause, prescreening and prevention of the spread of colon cancer, but the idea of it in itself just messes with the brain more than U really wanna know. Which brings me to sing the praises of the wonderful drugs they use on U during this procedure. Since the thought of someone doing that to anybody would send U thru fits of the creeps. For that reason, they give U something to relax U, and the other to make U FORGET. That’s the part I find fascinating as hell. Both times I've had this done, I've had the same result: the last thing I remember is the doctor walking into the room with his assistant, and by this time, Im already prepped and in my little hospital fashion statement they call a gown, I lay on my side and the doctor informs me that he's introducing a drug to my IV that will relax me. I watch it go into my arm and they continue to make mild conversation with me. The next thing I remember is waking up in my own bed hours later, fully refreshed and ready to start my day. No soreness to speak of. But its 2pm, and before he put me "out" it was just before 9am. What amazes me about this is that U don’t go to sleep. It’s a drug they describe as a "twilight drug" . U are only half awake and can follow instructions but U are totally unaware of it. Case in point. How did I wake up in my own bed? Well, from what Husbear tells me, I dressed myself in recovery room, spoke to the doctor who gave the all clear on the inspection, went downstairs to see a friend who works in the cafeteria in the hospital, chatted with her, ate a doughnut, brought another snack to take home, rode home with Husbear having full conversations, got home, crawled into bed at like 12 noon, and slept til 2.

Amazing!!! How the hell do they do that?? I ocassionally have flashbacks of pictures in my head of what happened afterwards, like the friend I met in the cafeteria was wearing purple, but nothing during the procedure. That really messes with your head. But like I said, clean bill of health, and I'll see him again in another 3 yrs. I encourage everyone to go thru it just for the peace of mind, but more importantly, for the trippy experience of trying to remember, lol.

What else is new? Well, I will be traveling to Orlando in October for the big Bear Bust, as well as going on the cruise for Bear Voyage. Im excited to be included in the trip so for all y'all bears out there, get ready, the ship's gonna be rockin'. More details when I get them.

The Men of Onyx are steadily gearing up for whats gonna be the leather party of the year in Atlanta with Blackout 11, also in October. So if U are thinking about getting run packages, time is running out, so get em soon if U are gonna get em at all. We are also setting up a flurry of activities surrounding Labor Day Weekend at the Eagle, starting with Bar night that Friday and possibly Saturday as well as Sunday. So if U are in town, stop in at the Atlanta Eagle and say hey to all of us as well as participate in the festivities.

Later,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

7/21/06

Well, here it is, as promised, the 2nd and now 3rd of the installments of videos that are out there that I happen to be in, lol. Who knew so much would come out at once? Im kinda proud of this accomplishment, 2 video releases, and a Calendar all in one month's time. I don’t think there's a preview for the Grey Rose video out there yet, but if one comes available, I'll make sure and tell U where to find it. I think its really good flick and cleverly done. My hat's off to the producer. He had a lot to work with and somehow made it happen smoothly. Also, in the trailers after the movie, there's another one with me in it that will be hitting the stores soon. Not sure when, but of course, stay tuned, and I'll let U know when I do. In the meantime, enjoy the double feature, lol.

Check out the action pics on BearFilms.com's website as well. I really liked how they turned out.

I've done quite a bit of traveling up and down the road lately to visit family back in KY the past week or two. Getting to see my nephews again was the highlight of the trip. And of course, the lowlight, unfortunately, was family, lol, go figure. We all have our share of dysfunctional families, Im sure, but sometimes I look back and realize, that there is no question as to why I live so far away from my original home. But again, home is where U make it. I love my life down here in Atlanta. I have a core group of friends that I wouldn’t trade for anything, and they don’t make judgments on anything I do, well, most of the time, but that’s what friends are for sometimes.

Anyway, Im gonna keep this one short, and mean it this time. Drop me a line sometime and lemme know how U like the new features, and if U don’t find em in a store near U, don’t worry, they're coming soon enough.

Later taters;)

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

7/11/06

Greetings Guys,

I hope y'all had a great 4th of July weekend. I know I did. However, due to the weather, once again at the very last minute, I have a box of rockets that I have yet to find the time to shoot off. Anybody wanna help me shoot my rocket?, lol. I'll probably follow form as I have done for years on end sometime and leave them sitting in the closet, forgetting them til sometime next year during this season, only to find them again after I've spent another wad of cash on ones that I didnt need because of the fact that I hoarde everything I own and forget it til I've paid for more, always works out that way no matter what it is. Dont ask me why, but I do. Lol, but if Im lucky, I'll find the time soon, and hopefully I dont disturb anyone's Christmas celebrations like last time, lol. Nobody needs to celebrate Kwansa with bottlerockets, please, its been done, by me. Sorry neighbors, lol.

Anyway, lots to tell this installment so here goes. As U may have seen on the front page of this site, I have another feature in a movie thats just come out called Daddy Flies Solo from Pantheon productions. With the magic of editing, and some great footage from my solo scene done a while back in SF when I did the first movie, Daddy Dreaming, this scene features my solo session from start to finish along with 17 other solos in the mix. I have to say, Im flattered to have even been included with so many hot guys. I hope U like it. And of course, I can add it to the list of things I've done in this wild and crazy ride I've experienced over the past few years. Hopefully I'll be going on another trip to SF soon for another feature, maybe before the end of the summer, who knows, Im just gonna wait and see what develops.

It seems a little funny that doing porn kinda takes time to see what U have done so long in the past. What I mean is that while it may seem that there's a little more activity with new things coming out, in all actuality, I did them over the course of maybe 3 months to a year ago and as it stands, several things happen to be coming out at the same time. Which is kinda cool. I've never been able to say that I have 2 or 3 things released within the same month, now I can. It just kinda works out that way. So there;)

In the meantime, I have more bits of media out there from my ever productive trip out to Chicago for IML on Memorial Day Weekend. I did a photo shoot and video with BearFilms.com which has posted the pics in their Action Pics gallery just this week. I think the pics turned out great. I hope U like them as well. My scene partner in the action shots we filmed was great also, he went by the name of Brent Chaps, an older but very hot daddy who seemed to hit it off well with me too. The video of that scene will be out soon I imagine, so stay tuned. As for the solo photo shoot, I'll let U know when that turns up as well. Hopefully, that meeting with Andy Dill and the guys at BearFilms will leave a lasting impression with them to do more in the future. My magic 8 ball says "All signs point to YES". Details to come soon enough.

As for more videos on the way that I've done already, there may be two more floating around in the next month, or maybe even sooner. I will let U know about it when there is an official release. I have one copy already and its SMOKIN', lol.

Hmm, what else is goin on with me lately, well I havent talked much about my bass guitar lessons lately. I am getting much better at my ear training, but its this damn reading thing thats getting me down, however I do practice and slowly but surely I am getting it. I've completed the first of the installment of 3 books that I learn with my instructor I meet with once a week, so thats a pretty good accomplishment in my book. I even had time to finally restring my bass for the first time this weekend, the sound clarity is amazing. U dont wanna even see the dirt and filth the others trapped. I know I didnt. Next on the agenda, Im gonna learn to slap and pop it like the pros. Give me time and I'll be doing this instead of porn, lol, perish the thought.

We had a great turnout at Onyx SE's bar night on Friday. I am learning to spend less time behind the bar by teaching the others how to also tend bar, but they also need to learn to really sell a drink, like in a harness and jockstrap, or is that just a preference of mine, lol. The Best Buns Contest went off famously with a female winner this time. Believe it or not, this girl put us all to shame with a healthy helping of how an ass should be served, SHAKEN! The crowd loved her, and my congrats go to her and her crew that showed up that nite. Dont forget, Blackout 11 is coming upon us fast. Get your run packages by clicking on the poster on the main page.

Thats it for now, Im pretty tired and the Husbear's already gone to bed for the night, so Im gonna follow suit. Talk to y'all later, and drop me a line when U can. Lemme know what U think of the solo performance as well as the new footage on BearFilms.com.

Im also gonna work on getting some much neede newer pics in my galleries very soon. I want to start a personal gallery of pics I take with friends out and about on the town as well, so check back soon.

Peace,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

6/27/06

Wow, what a Birthday week from HELL its been. All I can say at this point is that there's a reason that birthdays come only once a year, and its for people like me that do way too much partying for the average man. A very close friend once told me that he celebrates the month of his birth, rather than just the one day. I had to modify that one a little bit because at the pace I was going, I'd be dead well into 2 weeks of it, lol, so its only a week for me, and I barely survived that. My birthday was on Tuesday the 20th, so my week began on Sunday the 18th and went on into Atlanta's Gay Pride weekend on the following Sunday. Yeah, I know, its 8 days, why not push it with so much fun to be had.

So Saturday nite, the 17th, what was supposed to officially start the festivities was diverted suddenly by something that happens occasionally, but when it does, it knocks me down worse than anything any other time of the year. As Im getting ready for a night on the town, I start getting this sinking feeling in the pit of my gut that tells me, something's not right. And then it hit me. I started to get the last thing I needed, a summertime cold. Im sure U have all had them at some point, but they seem to be the worst ever for me. I should have called it quits and postponed everything and got my rest right then and there, but NOOOO! I had people waiting on me and I couldn’t disappoint. So I went out anyway and put on my best face and sucked it up. Man, that was a wrong move because it set the tone for the rest of the week. I danced all night, regardless of how bad I was feeling, and drank only 1 drink while out at the bar. We had plans for brunch with a big group of friends so I decided to take it easy on the liquor the night before. I survived the night, but not by much. I came home and woke up the next day, still, sick as a dog, if not worse. Cant stop now, I've got people waiting, lol, famous last words.
We got to brunch and the Husbear had arranged for about 15 of our closest friends join us for drinks on the patio at one of our favorite restaurants. It was a beautiful day and I was sitting at the middle of the tables looking like death served cold on a marble slab. I faked it as best I could, but then, the drinks started coming and that just made things worse. I know, I should have passed on the drinks, but hey, it’s the start of the celebration week. I had about 3 of the strongest martinis I think I 've had in years, ate til I could pop, and it was off to the next bar for more drinks. U see where this is goin, I bet. Well we moved the party to the next bar and I had just one more drink. My body could take no more. We stayed as long as we could but as soon as I came home, I was poured into bed and was down for the count.

On Monday and Tuesday was more of feeling just the same. It was awful. I think I had spent most of both days slumped over at my desk just waiting for someone to come by and put my out of my misery. This was no way to spend my birthday. That still wasn’t going to stop my plan for Tuesday night. The plan was to get a whole bunch of guys together and hang out at the local strip bar, which we did, sick or not. Had a great turnout there as well, bout 15 or so people came as well as a str8 co-worker who just couldn’t pass up a good time and just had to satisfy his curiosity. He ended up being the life of the party as we drank the night away watching countless dicks on the stage. I normally drink like 2 of their large drinks to keep me quite buzzed, anymore and I lose even more inhibition as well as consciousness. But hey, I had my designated driver, Husbear, with me. So why not let loose once a year, and that’s exactly what I did.

Wednesday morning, I woke up at home, not remembering anything of how I got there, the wild and crazy conversations I was having with Husbear or the wild jack-off fest I proceeded to have after I was once again, poured into bed. I did get to hear how the term "drunk dick" came about, and how I was considered a classic case, since I jacked so long and so feverishly only to fall asleep, dick in hand, after trying for a good 30 minutes nonstop to get "nothing" accomplished. I couldn’t if I wanted to and boy did I try. I am of course hearing about this second hand thru the Husbear, as he's laughing hysterically, since I wasn’t coherent at the time that all this took place in my drunken stupor, but wow, what a party it must have been. And what better way to top that off was a day at Six Flags to ride all and I mean all, the roller coasters I could stand. All I can say is thank goodness for those anti-hangover pills I took before last nite. Those things really work. Im living proof. I didn’t get sick the day after, during, or any part of being at the amusement park in the hot sun. Granted, I was still trying to recover from the cold, there was still much to do this week. Pride was coming up and I was determined that as long as my body didn’t shut down, neither would I. Not a wise thing to do, because U and I know what happens when your body finally puts on the brakes and says, hold on, no more of this torture, Im goin to sleep. It does just that. I wasn’t there yet, but hopefully I would outlast that effect.
Thursday, it was back to work and I was almost fully recovered from the cold, but just dragging from exhaustion. The week was almost over and all I had to do is make it to Friday and Im home free with an extra day off on Monday. I was smart enough to foresee the need for one so I took it off ahead of time. By Friday I was revved up and ready to hit the weekend with both feet. I coasted thru the day and was ready to hit the bars. Funny thing about Pride weekend here. Over the past few years, Atlanta has had horrible luck with rain storms coming in and putting a literal damper on our fun in the sun. Several years had gone by when the parade has come down the street in a deluge of water like none we'd ever seen. This year could be different. . . Or more of the same. This year, proved to be much worse. By the time I had hit the bars, the storm clouds had come in and there were reports already out there that the main stage for the Pride festivities were blown down. They were right. It was pushed down earlier that day by straightline winds blowing thru the area. How interesting that it was "straightline winds" that blew down our gay stage. One would think that somewhere, Rev. Falwell himself was sitting on his porch pulling a Nelson Muntz, going "Ha-Ha". So the park was closed that Friday night of all festivities. Thank goodness the injuries were few and very minor.

Saturday, the park was full and bustling with business as people came out in the sunshine to check out the folks that people hadnt seen all year except when they come out for Pride. U know the ones Im talkin about. A group of us got together to check out the tents and see the sights. U know, there's nothing like what my Husbear calls "carny food". Chicken on a stick, corndogs, and gyros from a place no larger than a rollup cart hoisted around by a pickup truck. It looks so scary when U see where it comes from, but when U are done, U just cant help but want a little more, lol. After that, we went home and made our plans for the next day. No sooner than I got in the car, the sky opened up for another round of wild storms that lasted thru the night. Was this a sign of things to come? U better believe it. The rain finally did let up the next morning but it was short lived. No sooner than the Parade on Sunday get to our corner on the street, the madness started all over again. This time it was not a light shower as it happened in years gone by. This was a downpour that lasted well past the end of the parade and had no signs of letting up anymore that day. It was so bad that the festivities in the park were completely and unmistakably cancelled for the day. The vendors, were all told to pack it up and go home, leaving nothing left in the park. And the rain kept coming. We were of course disappointed but at the same time we understood, nobody wanted to be in all that all day long. But hey, there's always next year, right? Well if it happens like this next year, I'll seriously rethink it for a split second before doing it all over again. And of course, I will, rain or shine, I'll be there ready to get my Pride on and toast what will always be considered to me at least, as my birthday week.

I'll have some interesting news I'll share with U at my next installment. Word on the street and in my hand, is another movie on the way to a store near U. Something I did back in November. I like it so far, details coming soon;)

 

6/09/06

Greeting Guys,

Well, the last few weeks have been running me ragged, but not always in a bad way. My eyes have returned to 100% and I was able to wear contacts again within a matter of weeks. And not a moment too soon, either. I was on my way out of town for a much needed vacation.

I hope everyone had a good Memorial Day weekend, because I sure did, in more ways than I could detail in one writing; but I'll try. Thanks to all the guys in Chicago for IML and Bear Pride that I got to meet for the first time. I got to meet most of my new Onyx brothers who graciously welcomed me into the fold. My favorite event will go down as being the infamous Onyx Ball held on Saturday nite. The party was so well executed and attended, that many of the coinciding parties in other ballrooms had to shut down waaay earlier than they expected. Now that’s how U throw a party. I had such a good time that I will definitely consider goin back next year.

The leatherfest in itself was worth every penny, from the Leather mart, to the after parties, and all the hot men that made it what it is today, my hat's off to U. I got to meet a lot of pornstars that weekend. Some I have known from just being online, to others I just had the great fortune to meet for the first time. Andy Dill, being one of the nicest pornstars I could have run into, had to be the best experience. We actually got to do some work together while I was there. And no, he wasn’t in the scene with me, dammit, but behind the camera, which was hot in and of itself. With that said, look for me on another site sometime in the near future. I'll be making a few appearances there one way or another thanks to that great meeting. I'll let U know what becomes of it when I know.

This month is going by so quickly, and believe it or not, I had to remind myself that my birthday is coming up soon on the 20th. Im gonna be 37, not a huge milestone number, but by all means, another reason to celebrate life. I plan on blowing out the whole week in style, starting that Sunday the 18th having parties with the Husbear and our normal crew for brunch, then on the day itself, Im goin to the local strip club here for drinks and a much needed lap dance, lol. By the way, one of U owes me several, and U know who U are, lol. Then taking the day off the next day for Pearl Day at Six Flags here in Atlanta, and after that, its on to Pride Weekend, the party to end all parties in the park. Needless to say, Im gonna be wrecked by the time this week is all over with. I might even start to feel like a 37 yr old instead of my mental state of 12, lol. Unfortunately, my friends from KY wont be here like last year due to other plans, but the house will still have its share of guests from out of town. My friend and pornstar, Jason Starr of Hotoldermale.com will be hanging out in Atlanta to partake in the festivities for the first time. It will be great to show him around. If U happen to him roaming the park alone, he's lost and needs to find the nearest dick available, lol, and U can tell him I said that;).

That’s all for now, y'all have a safe and happy Pride weekend, as well as celebrate Pride whenever U damn well feel like it.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

5/20/06

A word to the wise, y'all, don’t ever screw around with your eyes. And how did I learn that lesson? The hard way, of course. I went to sleep early one Monday evening to get a jump start on Tuesday as I knew it would be a long day. Woke up the next morning as usual, before the sun came up, made my way to the bathroom in the dark so as not to wake up the Husbear. Closed the door, flipped on the light, Yelled like bloody murder for a split second from the INTENSE sensitivity to light in my right eye, flipped off the switch and took a few seconds to figure out what the hell was wrong. Turned on the light with both eyes closed tightly, opened the left eye, which was also a little sensitive but nothing like the right, and sloooooowwly opened my right eye. It was bloodshot and in intense pain. I sleep with my contacts in since they are extended wear so I did what I could to take them out of my pounding head at this point, which was a feat in itself, and looked as closely at my eye without being blinded from the light again, it was as if I had been crying all nite, and from the looks of it, my eye had a mind of its own and just crying away. I woke up the Husbear who looked at it and said it looked like I had maybe scratched my cornea with something while I was sleeping. Hell, maybe I did, I get lashes in my eyes all the time and could have rubbed it in my sleep or something, whatever it was, it was painful to say the least. I called in to work and went back to bed. Rest is probably the best thing for me right now. So I woke up later and was able to surf the net, with the monitor turned waay low and the shades tightly shut so no light could get in. From the symptoms, I proably did scratch my cornea but the good news, the cornea heals pretty quickly and should be ok in a day or so. So no need to see a doctor, right? So I laid low for the day and did what I could to get around. I felt like a vampire the entire day, doing what I could to stay out of direct sunlight. Anytime I was, it was excruciating. The next day, I expected things to be back to normal. Woke up on schedule, made my way back to the bathroom, and said to myself, lets try this again. Well, same results were there, no better than the day before. So I called out again, had the Husbear take me to the eye doctor, lo and behold, the first thing she asked me was, Do U wear contacts to bed, well I said, sure, they're extended wear so I can. She looked me straight in my good eye and said, "Not anymore U cant". Asked if I had worn them longer than they needed to be in, and I had to admit, yes, a lot longer. I have done it time and time again for years. I get 2 week lenses and wear them for a month, get 1 month lenses and wear them for 6 weeks, maybe longer. I had no symptoms of anything wrong with it, just saving money here and there where I can. Contacts can be expensive as Im sure most of U know, but yeah, I know, that was no excuse for risking your eyesight. Well as it turns out, this little money saving stunt caused a corneal ulcer, and from what they were saying, it was HUGE. They gave me drops to stop the growth of the ulcer, but that will take time to heal completely from the sheer size of the ulcer. It hasn’t healed perfectly yet, but its on the mend. I do have moments during the day where vision in that eye is completely off, but they say that’s normal in a healing eye. But its every bit as uncomfortable as the injury itself. So if U don’t have to go thru it, take my word for it, DON’T. Im back to my glasses for the time being, and have about 1 more week to go thru this because I hate my glasses, as most people do, but going thru this, I have learned a valuable lesson…get Lasik if U can afford it, lol. Which I cant, so I have to deal with the other lesson, be good to your eyes, no matter the cost. They are the only 2 U get. I know U are wondering, why do I have to put this out there? Well if it keeps one person from going thru the hell I've been thru, then its all worth it to me. Now, Im not gonna come up with some corny slogan to help U remember this, like "Don’t be a fool, glasses arent cool" or something like that. Just learn from my mistake, that’s all, and U will be able to keep your eyes, and keep on reading normally when U come to my site. Because Im not coming out with a brail site anytime soon, lol.

Anyway, on with the good stuff. Our Kinky Carnival hosted by Onyx was a huge success! I was stunned to see how many people did show up to participate. To that, I say thanks for coming out to support Onyx. We had quite a few guests stop by including pornstar Ty Lattimore. He's always such a cool guy to talk to. I didn’t get to talk much due to the fact that I was doin what I do best I guess, tending bar. I guess I did get to talk to quite a few people at some level because they all had to get to me to get their drink on, lol, so that was cool. We had lots of things to offer that night, including Hotdogs, Popcorn, the Butt Plug Wheel of Fortune, a Fortune teller, as well as lots of prizes. I would consider that a great time no matter how U put it. I did worry about the weather though, it was rather iffy right up until time to open. Stormed all day with the forecast set to rain all weekend, but I said a few prayers, put in some white contacts and waved at the clouds, pulled out my mystical necklace, called for the Zephyr winds that blow up high, and even did a spin or two to deflect a few raindrops, all to keep the weather at bay, lol. I think it worked for the most part. By the way, if U got that last few bit of this paragraph as to what I had to do, I congratulate U, for those still confused, dig deep into your childhood, U might get it, eventually. LOL.

At any rate, Im getting ready for IML coming up at the end of the month. Hope to see y'all there. If U see me first, stop and say Hi. In the meantime, remember, don’t mess with your eyes. Hopefully I wont be wearing glasses by then. Take it from me. Its no fun goin thru this if U don’t have to.

Til next time, be good to each other, and if not, be good at it;)

Woof/Harry Wolfe

5/1/06

I dont know if I've just had a writers block for a month or just got too busy to continue writing at the pace I wanted to go for so long that when I finally did find the time to sit down and reflect, there wasnt a single thing I could think of to put down on paper. So Im just gonna sit down and resort to what I did before, put my fingers to the keyboard and start thinking on paper. That seems to work sometimes better than writing down topics and trying to elaborate on each point as I go down the list. Whats been up with me lately, I cant think right now, I'll come back in a minute, maybe breakfast will help...............

Ok, Im back, still nothing, lol, this process might take longer this time, but Im determined to get this down while I can. I'm riding the train to work again. After a long time away from doing that, I guess U could say Im a fairweather rider, since during the winter, I wanted nothing to do with standing out in the cold waiting for the bus to get there, so I quit. Now that the weather's getting warmer and gas prices give me no choice, Im gonna have to just suck it up and do it whenever I can.

I am proud to say that I am featured this month on Hotoldermale.com's site as an Admirer. U will see it on their homepage. Truth be told, I had forgotten all about the pics we did during the shooting of the movie last year, so when someone told me they were out there, I had to see for myself. I dont think I have ever been that lean in my life. I hope I can get back there for the summer months to look my best. I hope U like the pics, so let me know what U think. I cant post them here so check them out on their site if U get a chance.

As U probably have noticed, I have changed up my front page with a few new pics. The latest one is the poster I was telling U guys about the last time I wrote on the site. Its the poster advertising Blackout 11, brought to U by The Men of Onyx Southeast. We had a great time coming up with the poster and my friend with me in the pic, who will remain nameless until I get his permission to post it, is also there. U wouldnt believe how stressed we were about trying to look our best before the shoot. I think everything turned out pretty well. The link to the details on the function is found by clicking the pic or just by going to Onyxmen.com. Its shaping up to be quite the event, so get your package soon and I'll definitely see U there. Speaking of Onyx, we are having our Kinky Carnival finally on Friday May 5th from 10pm until 2am at the Atlanta Eagle. Lots of different games and prizes to participate in, so I hope to see U local guys there. We werent able to have it last month like we wanted since the weather was so "iffy" and had to cancel. As luck would have it, it turned out to be a pretty decent night anyway. Im still enjoying being behind the bar when I can. This time I want to participate in officiating some of the games during bar night so a little less time behind the bar. Anyway, we'll see how it turns out.

Im goin to IML in Chicago this year for a second time at the event. I had such a great time with it last year that I cant wait to get back. If U are planning to be there, be sure to check out the Onyx sponsored events. We have two dances, one on Saturday and Sunday night. They always turn out to be a hot event, so plan to be there early.

Thats all for now, but before I go, I want to give a shoutout to my friend Bill in Boston, who came down for a visit last month. We had such a great time with him, and I love to be the host when he's here. I dont think he's had such a drama filled evening in such a long time, lol, and U know what I mean, Bill, lol. No, nothing went on like that. I just introduced him to a few friends of mine while the husbear and I did our normal routine out on the town on Sunday nites. Well for that fact, I didnt expect it to be that explosive, but hey, things happen on the spot sometimes, and where there's words exchanged, there's almost always a fight, lol. Nothing, I shouldnt have said anything. I'll let U make up your own stories behind that one. I meant to be vague;)

This post may be a bit confusing, but I did what I set out to do, just think and let my fingers walk where they may, and yes, my mind does wander, but I'll keep this one as is.

Anyway, Cya soon wherever I see ya, and feel free to drop a line anytime. Peace.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

3/21/2006

Okay, okay, its taken two guys in 2 days to send me messages that pretty much told me to get off my ass and update this site for me to actually do it, lol, and one of U in person. How sad is that? I finally have people making regular visits to this place and here I am doing nothing, so it seems. So Pete, Matt, here it is, lol. Truth be told, I have been kinda busy working on a few things personally, professionally and so on to the point that I have to stop and make myself do things just to keep up the flow. So to those of U who have been coming back only to see that I havent done anything, Im sorry. But in the next few months, I'll have plenty more to talk about.

In the meantime, over the past few weeks, I've been working on a project near and dear to my heart nowadays, which is an event coming up in October, Columbus Day Weekend, October 6-8 2006. The event is called Blackout 11 and is sponsored by Onyx, the Leathermen's club for people of color that I joined a while back. We have been feverishly putting together some really hot events over the weekend that its here as well as a massive ad campaign we're trying to roll out. Those will be seen very soon in the form of fliers, posters, possibly T-shirts, and over the web. Part of that project is to provide a picture/logo that would personify Blackout 11. I as well as another Onyx member, who's name I will leave out out of this until I get his ok, will be a big part of the ad campaign as the faces of Blackout 11. That ball was set into motion last weekend when he and I stripped for the cause and put our best "assets" forward to create what I think is a killer poster to draw more interest in the event. Once I get the go-ahead, I will post it here as well as info on how to be a part of the event. For now, if U would like to know more about Onyx, feel free to check out the official website at www.onyxmen.com. Our last bar night was a blast. It was a post Mardi Gras/Bare as U dare theme. I got to bartend again and after a few drinks, found myself in a few less clothes than I normally would have. Then before U know it, was wearing nothing but a leather harness and jock strap. I wasnt the only one though. I had company back there. Another Onyx brother helped by baring his goods wearing nothing but a jockstrap as well. It was a blast. The next bar night is Friday April 7th. If weather is good to us, we'll be holding our Kinky Carnival, with games, prizes, and special guests. If U are in the area, U should check it out for sure. We're at the Atlanta Eagle every first Friday of the month. I was only a bystander at the last Kinky Carnival that was held there back in late Summer 05, but now I get to take part. See U there;)

I have been steadily learning to read music now for the past couple of weeks in order to further my bass lessons. The more I learn, the more I really wanna dig into it. I feel like I know enough to feel my way around ok but I get around other bass players and I am quickly reminded of how much farther I have to go. But it all comes with the territory, I do know that. So I keep tugging along until I get it right. I went into a bass shop a few days ago here locally in Atlanta just to look at some of the models and see if maybe I could gain a few tips thru listening to some of the guys play in there. Had a nice conversation with the store owner, or at least he was someone who worked there, played a mean bass. I think going in there on occasion will help me gauge my playing ability and I can just see whats out there. I'd love to just go sit in on a band, any band some night just to focus on the bass player. I can imagine that would probably be the best way to seek knowledge about one's own instrument. At any rate, my interest in it is certainly growing in it. I wonder if there's a market out there for bass players who dabble in porn, lol. If not, there's about to be;)
Speaking of porn, I have at least one bit of news on that front. I have been in touch with the producer I worked with before and coming this spring/Summer, I will have a chance to work with him again. I would love to do it again, and then maybe hang it up and focus on something else. Besides, this whole website thing has been one hell of a rollercoaster ride and I wanna end it on a high note for sure. So lets say by late summer, early fall, who knows, there might be another title out there with my name in the credits somewhere. We'll just keep our fingers crossed.
For now, lets just take it easy, one note at a time. Drop me a line if U so choose to do so, and I'll get back with ya.

Talk to ya soon,

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

2/18/2006

Greetings Fellow visitors and passers by, I kinda like that, lol. Hope its been a good few weeks since we last spoke. I know its been great for me. Its kinda nice having some downtime from normalcy every once in a while. The Holiday (VD) is over, not that we did much to celebrate. We got each other a simple card and went to dinner. Thats all we pretty much wanted so having a quiet weekend at home, it was definitely something we both wanted, nothing more. We'll save the big stuff for Anniversaries, Birthdays, Etc.

The weekends before, were so much fun for me, I cant wait to do it again. As U may or may not know, I am a member of the Onyx Men Leather club. Every first Friday of the month, we have our Bar night down at the Eagle here in Atlanta. Its a chance for us to all get together in the back bar and socialize, have a good time, and meet new people. During some of these times together, we also make sure our time is spent having fun with different themes for different charities in the area. This past Christmas, during our bar night, we had a theme called Kinky Christmas with Kinky Santa and his Naughty little Elves. We setup the back bar with a huge boot blacking chair, where Santa would of course sit, and his Elves, (I got to be a naughty Elf). To raise money for a charity, we took pictures with the bar patrons that hung out with us for the night, put the picture in a Holiday card insert and that was their keepsake for the night. It wa a lot of fun and we had such a good turnout that I hope we do it again next year too. Last months Bar night theme was Black History month in the Leather community. We posted pictures of some of the people of color who have influenced both Onyx and the Leather community as a whole along with a very nice BIO on each person. And as a surprise, to us, the Southeast Chapter, we had some visitors from the Chicago Chapter pay us a surprise visit which was really cool because some of them were right there on the wall as well. I had never met them before, but KG and Blackkat, U guys are the bomb in person. I will link U to Blackkat's webpage on my links page. I also would like to say hey to all the guys out there that showed up that night. I dont wanna forget y'all. It was my first time bartending that night and I was pretty nervous. Forget pretty nervous, I was scared shitless at first, but I wanted to learn and U guys made it that much more easier. U got me thru it and I ended up loving it by the end of the nite. So I'll probably end up doing it at some point next Bar night. Speaking of which, our next Bar night will be Friday March 3rd, and we'll be having a post Mardi Gras theme/Bare as U Dare theme. Not sure how much we can get away with in the Bare as U Dare department, but if U happen to be at the Atlanta Eagle that night, look for me behind the bar, I might surprise U;).

On to other news, I have decided to take matters into my own hands and do things right. By that I mean, Im goin to a professional Bass guitar instructor and my first lesson is this coming Tuesday after work. Im looking forward to this more than U will ever know. I have fun playing by ear and learning more and more each time I pick it up, but I want to learn everything about how to actually become not just a good bass player, but learn other styles, and eventually become great at it. Hell, if I can do the whole porn thing semi successfully, then this should be cake, lol. At any rate, I'll let U know how it goes, and who knows, one day I might be putting out the invite to come see me play in some seedy tavern with a live band, lol, but of course, one step at a time, I cant get that far ahead of myself, and by saying that I think I just did for now, lol.

Talk to ya later, guys.

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

2/1/06

See, Im getting better at this already. I am trying to keep myself to an every other week update to get in the habit of writing here. I have been such a slackass in the past that one of my resolutions this year is to stay more in touch with U guys. So many of U have come up to me in the past and asked when I was going to update the site, that it was almost embarrassing when I look back and see that its been almost 2 months since writing. What are people to think? Anyway, on with the blog.

I have run up against a dry spell of sorts lately. Nothing really new is happening to me at this juncture in time, or maybe I just don’t see it. I’ve started making plans to go to IML in Chicago on Memorial Day Weekend. The Husbear is taking a group of guys up there to tour the town while we are there. I had such a great time last year seeing all the guys at the Leatherfest that I definitely have to go again.

In the meantime, Im practicing on getting better at playing my bass guitar. I thought I was doing pretty well for a person without lessons. I turn on the radio, or play some of my downloaded music on my PC at home and just play what I hear. I have, in that respect, gotten good at that part, and I even have a few programs that have taught me how to read sheet music on the bass clef as well as where to play it on my bass. I never knew there were so many variances to playing just one note, its crazy. ( and if this is boring U at any time, stop reading this chapter because its not going to get any better, lol) Well I was surfing the web and watching videos online of guys practicing their bass when I got a reality check. I am NOWHERE near where I wanna be compared to these guys. Maybe Im setting my expectations too high for my learning level, and I think I have improved more than 100 percent from where I was a few months ago, and maybe this is the natural progression of how I am to learn this, but seeing those guys just practicing, I have a LOOONG way to go. But hey, never give up. If this site has done anything for me, its that.

Im working on hopefully doing another movie late spring and to have it released sometime this summer. That ball is at least rolling and my name has been put in the hat. Thanks to all U guys out there that have sent your emails congratulating me on the movie. I guess the longer its out there, the more people actually see it, and that’s always a good thing.

Im working on developing a side project for the Husbear, no details to speak of yet, though. I wanna see how far he runs with it before I spill any beans. Nothing on the lines of what Im doing, by any means, but something fun, no doubt.

Well, speaking of other projects, I guess I do have one project that I have been working on. As some of U may or may not know, I am a very new member of the ONYX Men, and this coming Columbus Day, we will be hosting Blackout XI right here in Atlanta. We expect quite a large turnout with the way we are planning the events. I will be adding more info on how to get registered as well as other events shortly. In the meantime, we’re in the planning stages so stay tuned. For now, if U would like to visit the ONYX website, click the link above.

Anyway, that’s all for now, Im tired of writing already and Im sure U are tired of reading just the same. I’ll try to keep current on my current events to keep U guys comin’ back for more. More pictures on the way soon, I hope. I need to revamp my galleries desparately. I know, I get those requests too, lol.

Back atcha soon;)

Woof/Harry Wolfe

 

1/16/06

Greetings, readers, and once again, I have failed U in keeping current with my blogging. Im sorry, but it seems I just didnt get the hint that some people out there enjoy reading this stuff when I started getting emails asking when I was going to update this part of my site. That was never more apparent this weekend when I went out on the town and met more than just a few guys out and about that had number one, seen the site to begin with, saw the movie, and wanted to congratulate me on my progress over the years. All of them ended the conversation with one general question: "When are U going to update your site?". With that, I couldnt defend myself with anything other than, Im sorry, please forgive me, I've been busy, but I'll do it soon. So here I am, and thanks for reminding me that people out there actually do read this and enjoy it for some strange reason or another so here I go again. And I can only say I will TRY to be better at it so that Im not so latent in filling U guys in on whats new in my life. I have to say its flattering to know that on occasion, people do turn here to kinda take a moment from their own lives to find out whats going on in mine. So for that reason I will continute to get better at it.

As for whats new, hmm, well the Husbear and I have made it thru the holidays in one piece it seems, and Im certainly glad its over, as a lot of U out there get more stressed out than usual this time of year. It was indeed a strange one for me. Dealing with a year of firsts without some of my family members, which is very hard at times, but nonetheless, U have to get thru it the best way U can and with family and friends close by, that seems to help with the times that seem a little rougher than others. To them, I say thank U. We couldnt have done it without U.

I chose to spend a lot of the holidays this year reflecting. Personally I have had some incredible highs, and some devastating lows that the highs can never compete with replacing. I've been lucky enough to take some trips this year that I will never forget, and got to be with family when I was needed most. And my Husbear was able to share in some of that in which he was needed the most. I cant thank him enough for his support and understanding thru this year thru the good and the bad. I can only hope that this year will be better all around so that I wont have so much sadness to reflect on this time next year. But thats another story.

Enough of that though, hope I havent bored U to tears yet with sentimental stuff, sorry, thats me, lol. On with the good stuff. This past few months I have been picking up another hobby a lot more and actually getting good at it. I know I have referred to it before, but Im teaching myself to play Bass Guitar in my few and fleeting moments in what I call spare time. Im a damn good ear trainer and am just starting to learn to read, music, that is, lol. And one day Im gonna take this act on the road, lol. Anybody out there need a naked bass player? Just kidding, lol. But I have quite a bit to learn and one day hopefully soon I will take professional lessons to really get me going, but for now, I'll keep practicing until I get it right.

I have kinda been in a rut with the places I go to have fun in this town. Atlanta has a great nightlife but its also easy for staleness to set in and before U know it, U wonder what the hell U are doing there in the first place. So I decided about a month ago, Im doin the Eagle, for a while at least. I like the crowd there and even though I know a lot less people there, the music's great, and I will meet more friends there as well. And since Husbear doesnt hang out on Saturday nites, we currently have Sunday's off and we spend our tiime with friends watching the drag show for the night at our favorite watering hole in Ansley. Its kinda like our little routine together, for now. As I have learned all too well, nothing is more constant than change itself.

Before I go this time, Im gonna give a shoutout to a few guys that have really made me stop and think about the great people out there that can really enrich your lives with new friends and acquaintances. David, U know who U are, thanks so much for the dinner, the friendship and the laughs. Im sure I can count on U for more laughs this coming year, Im gonna need it, lol. And to the guys that have come up and said that they liked what I was doing out here but never had the balls to do it themselves, trust me, U can. Just get out there and do it. And lastly, I ran into a group of new friends I met just about a year ago from my hometown and I met them at the exact same party I met my very close friends JizzJazz69 and his partner Montenegro. Well I was in a bar where I was dancing, and no, not professionally, lol, just on the dancefloor. They were here on a business/vacation and I hadnt seen them for the most part since early last year. I was shocked as hell to see them when I did and after we talked for a while and the bar was closing, they started on their way back to the hotel they were staying at when one of them looked back and said, "Hey, When are U going to update your website?". Well here it is, guys, and thanks for kicking me in the butt and reminding me that U are still listening, lol. Im outta here for now.

Peace.

 

11/12/05

Its amazing how things just get away from me sometimes. One thing messes up my rhythm and everything falls apart. Case in point, when was the last time that I have updated this thing? Good question, I know, but there have been so many other things on my mind and on my plate that its hard to focus on the things that are right in front of your face. But I digress again, so on with the update, lol. I'll try to be a lot better with these from now on. Im going to try to take a few pointers from my favorite blogger and close friend, Jizzjazz69. He at least keeps up with updating his on a regular basis, so I have made a pact with myself to try to do the same.

The past few weeks have been pretty intriguing to me in more ways than I care to imagine. Lots of changes have taken place whether it be work related, or socially, they say the only thing constant is change, well, Im finding out just how true that is. I have started to take the train to work since gas prices, however the price seems to be coming down, there was a time when it got too unbearable to look at my car without feeling the tug on my wallet stronger than I could bear. Y'all feelin it too, I know. So the whole experience of commuting to work on someone else's schedule is foreign to me, yet, millions of people do it everyday, and so can I. Its been pretty enlightening to know that U are interracting with different people everytime U get on a train or bus, and yet, there are things about people I am learning thru overhearing simple conversations that I never wanted to know, lol. Several examples that sent me thru a shell shock period:
How bout the girl that sat right behind me on her cellphone yelling at the top of her lungs so everyone can hear about how her pastor is not only doing weed, but offering it to his parishoners, answers her call waiting, only to ask the girl on the other line to stop yelling.
Or the guy who snores with his neck back and mouth open, that’s just baaad, lol. Who really needs to know U sleep like that?

But I have also embarrassed myself once or twice too. No, Im not innocent either. I was a bit tired after work one night so when I get to the train, its at the end of the rail line so it sits for a few minutes before taking off. Now, I am 5 stops from where I need to be, so I have a little time to relax and just wait to get to my stop. I prop my leg up on the sideboard, rest my head on my lunch bag and the wall, and fall asleep, kinda. I do notice the train pulling off so I keep a mental note to myself to count the stops, so I can get off when I need to. Should be easy enough, right? Well I had no idea at the time, but I was setting myself up to make a total ass out of myself. Well, I dozed off for longer than I wanted to. Felt the train stop, the doors opened, so by this time the train had filled up pretty much to capacity in the car I was in, I snapped out of unconsciousness, noticed the doors open, and I looked for any identifier that would tell me where I was, now also keep in mind, that nobody else was moving at the time, apparently those that wanted to get on and get off at this stop had done so. I looked up, and saw the sign to my station. Still groggy from that cat nap, I panicked, jumped up and made my way towards the door, but here's where the rug is pulled out from under me. Having propped my leg up on the baseboard and the way I was leaning while I was asleep, my entire right leg had decided to do the same. By the time I took the first step, I realized that I was dazed, confused, and dragging a sleeping stump that was once my leg towards the door before it closed. Im sure I looked like a crazed idiot by the time I got off the train. I stood outside the train for a split second before I then realized, my lunch bag was still sitting on the seat behind where my head was propped up. So I had to dash in with the same bum leg I dragged off the train, grab the bag, and rush back off the train. I did that, still of course in my mind causing the biggest scene over this so I continued at that pace towards the exit, or what I thought was the exit. Looking around, I noticed in my confused and panicked state that something was terribly wrong, still. I looked up, and the sign that I saw that made me run off the train in the first place was not telling me which station I was at, but it was telling me that this train was only bound for that station. I had gotten off one stop TOO SOON.

By this time, I had run only as far as the next door in the same car of the train before realizing this, and after going thru all of this total embarrassment, I then had to decide like NOW, do I get in this train that’s already here for me, or wait, save face, and get on another train. Well, it was late, I was tired, still dazed and confused, so I jumped on the train just as the doors were closing. I was in the same train car full of people that saw my flailing around like an idiot, only in a different seat near a different set of doors. I tucked my head down and said to myself, Im never falling asleep again on a train, lol. What amazed me the most is the fact that the entire experience I just described to U only took a few seconds to unravel, however, it seemed like an eternity at the time. I don’t know how the doors managed to stay open for so long, or at least that was my perception of the whole thing. Now after an experience like that, I got home, and telling the story again to the Husbear, it seemed like it was the easiest thing to laugh at myself for going thru it all. But at the time, I hated every second of it. Now if I cant laugh at myself once in a while, then what the hell am I doing here. I hope U all can do the same sometime, and learn to laugh at yourselves. It might take your mind off of the other things goin on in this crazy world we live in. As I like to say from time to time, provide your own entertainment every once in a while, and by all means, learn to laugh at yourself most of all.

The Husbear and I are taking this weekend off from the rest of the world to celebrate our 8th anniversary. No big plans, no phones, just us. Sometimes its cool to do absolutely nothing but stare at the one U love. Try it sometime. U might like it.

Another great thing happened during my long break from blogging. I am officially a full Brother of the Onyx Men. I was inducted with a great candle ceremony in front of who I know will be very close friends very shortly. It was an honor to be considered let alone to be inducted. We are in the planning stages of Blackout 11, a gathering of Onyx men from all over the country. Previously for the past 10 years, its always been held in Chicago. Well, this coming Columbus Day weekend, get ready. There's going to be a black sea of leather for as far as the eye can see. For more info on the Onyx Men, click the link.

Anyway, that’s just a few of the things going on in my life for now. I will add more very soon in the line of pics and more blogging on a more regular basis. And thanks for putting up with my rants.
Peace, y'all.

 

9/15/05

As the saying goes, when it rains, it pours. The past few months have already been amazing to me in more ways than I could have ever imagined. My new alter ego, Harry Wolfe, has taken on a life of his own almost. First off, the movie has been well received based on the emails I have gotten lately. People seem to have no problem getting to "Daddy Dreaming" from my site as well as other places. I got to see it displayed in a few local video stores as well as a few other surprises I will touch on later. The experience in itself of seeing this thing thru to the end has been nothing less than surreal. I got my copy shortly after the official release was made public, but the act of actually watching myself on film kinda creeped me out, lol. Its like the fact that most people don’t like hearing themselves over a speaker, well, this takes a lot more getting used to. I said before that the preview online took a while to actually play, and it wasn’t a technical difficulty, it was me. But again, I got thru it, and was impressed with what they did with it. This time, Im holding the DVD case in my hand and with finger on the Play button, I froze. I got this far in the reality of it and just froze, lol. What was I about to see?

So after a few more minutes of contemplating my opinion of myself after seeing it, trudged on and got to the main menu. It was me, right on the title page, I kinda grinned and thought of the accomplishment I had just gotten to. So on with the movie…. I watched the whole thing and immediately thanked the producer, Chris Roma on a job well done with what he had to work with, me. I had no idea it would turn out so well. By the end of the movie, I was beaming from ear to ear, but of course had to think back of a few of the scenes that I had to cringe at. I mean, U will always be your worst critic over things other people may not see, so I did have a few reservations on an angle or two. Put it this way, now I know that its harder than most people think to keep jiggly parts from jiggling when U are goin at it in one way or another, lol. And the patio scene? What the hell was I thinking with that permagrin smile right at the end. Harry Wolfe must learn to work on that, seriously, lol. I chastized him for that in my head, lol. So all in all, I was quite impressed with my first venture onto the DVD screen. I hope to do more sometime, but that will all come in time. And to those of U who bought the DVD, thank U from the bottom of my heart. I'd love to hear from U if U have seen it. Lemme know what U thought. I was able to find one review out there so far along with my new profile based on Harry Wolfe. Check it out when U get a chance at ManNet.com. The profile and movie details are there along with a lengthy review. U might have to hunt and peck for the review and profile by the time U read this since I couldnt link directly to it, but its a good read.

As I said before, when it rains, it pours. I was out at a local bar not after the movie came out and a friend walks up and says, "U know U have made it when U become a refrigerator magnet." Huh?? I looked at him like he had 3 heads because I didn’t know what the hell he was talking about. He told me that he was down at the local bookstore and found a refrigerator magnet with my "picture" on it. At that point I didn’t know what to do other than go check it out the next day. So we went into the store, looked at the magnets of all the naked men that were there, and sure enough, there I was. At first, I didn’t know who had done it but after looking at the back of the magnet, it named the photographer as the owner of the Woolsrake.com website. I did a shoot with him on his rooftop the same time I did the Black Inches shoot. Actually I did it the day before, but he did say that he would do what he could to get me some exposure from the pics he took. Some of them can be seen in my gallery as well. It was a proud moment for me. We picked out two of them and went about our day.

The weekend after that, I was having dinner with an out of town friend who knew about the magnet and went to look for it in the same store I told him he could find it. They were sold out but then he asked me if I was on a calendar in there for Falcon. He saw a guy that looked like me in the calendar and wondered if I had done pictures for them. I told him, "Trust me, if I made it to Falcon, then I think I 'd know about it. That would be hittin it big time, and Im not there yet, lol". We finished our lunch and decided to hit the bars for an early drink, and while we were right across from that same bookstore where the magnet used to be, we decided to go in to check out what new items were there. While in the store, I went to the calendar section to check out the Falcon calendar he had told me about. I wanted to see this guy he said looked like me. So we looked at the back for all of the models and sure enough I wasn’t there. He then corrected his mistake and said that it wasn’t the Falcon calendar he saw the guy that he thought was me, so we continued to look and he pulled out one other calendar called Bear Men 2006, a 16 month calendar. He said, this is the one he was looking at, turned it over, and well what do U know, IT WAS ME! Mr. February 2006. I stood there just awestruck that this went right under my nose from the last time I was in there. Same picture as the magnet, but calendar sized. WOW, I couldn’t believe it. So of course I had to have it to add to my collection. Things like this don’t happen to me everyday, let alone in one lifetime. U can see the calendar from this link at 10percent.com. Just click on the calendar link and scroll down to Bear Men 2006 by Jim Kempster and see the images there. I wrote Jim to thank him for the exposure. I was incredibly honored to be included in a his calendar and magnet collection. This month has truly been a month of firsts for me. I have been riding high ever since. Lets just see where else this ride takes me. More news when I get it. Thanks for hangin in there between updates, and I really appreciate all your well wishes.

Harry Wolfe

 

8/05/05

Well, I don’t know how else to start this one but to just say it, IT'S HERE!!! IT'S FINALLY HERE!!! My first movie is finally out and I am more excited than anything I have ever imagined this day would be. I got my first clue that it was about to be distributed is thru the website of the producer at HotOlderMale.com, the guys that gave me the chance to do this. Without them, this wouldn’t be possible. The movie is called "Daddy Dreaming". I saw the preview for the first time just a few nights ago, and to say the least, they did a wonderful job with the footage they had. I have to say though, it kinda wierded me out about seeing myself. I mean its strange to hear your taped voice and even seeing yourself on video for the first time, but to see yourself having sex, now that’s an odd experience, lol. In my opinion, U gotta have a strong sense of self confidence to do that, I did, or else I wouldn’t have done it, but I'm gonna have to get used to seeing myself doing things that I usually watch people doing for my own pleasure. Its just plain weird right now, but Im workin on it, lol. To get the video, just click the link that says video in the upper link portion of this page, or any link that says video. Once U do happen to see it, I hope U drop me a line and let me know what U thought of it. Im interested in seeing what other people think too. Im hoping that with the production that they did, I wont look at least half bad, lol.

Needless to say, during the trip to SF to make this movie, I met and worked with a lot of great guys, like Clint Taylor, who is in addition to being a HOT stud, very cool to hang with. He was the first guy I worked with that weekend, and by far the coolest. Hart Caldwell and Gus I "got to know" on the second day and were both very friendly and seasoned professionals in their own right. Even though I just met them as well as the crew, the professionalism was thru the roof, it seemed like a tight knit family during the filming. I remember, after the 2nd day of shooting, which was the back patio scene, we finished up our shoot, showered off, and went back into the house and all had lunch together, just to chill. We sat around talking for the longest time before I noticed, we were still naked, lol. Now that’s a comfort level I didn’t think I could achieve with guys I just met. But hey, its all in a day's work.

Anyway, Im gonna keep this one short, I'll let the work stand for itself. Check it out thru the many links on this site and by all means, spread the word that its out there and that U can find it here.

I hope to be hearing from U guys soon,

Later for now, ;)

Woof (Harry Wolfe) …I kinda like that.

 

7/15/05

I'd like to take this time to announce the birth of someone new in my life. A birth, not in the sense of a newborn, but someone who has experienced something extremely new to this person and through that experience comes another entity. Confusing U yet? I hope not. This might explain it for U. This all took place a few months ago, mid May to be exact. I submitted a few pics to an adult video company, just for shits and giggles to see what would happen. I actually sent some pics to a few companies to gauge the response. Some responses, an emphatic no, others, no response at all. One in particular, not only expressed an interest, he said yes. Well, over the course of a few more weeks, we chatted, I did my homework on the type of other work this company put out, and was quite impressed with the quality of his work. We agreed on a time and place to meet, and the plan was set to actually do a video. I, not expecting to hear much of anything from anyone was kinda thrown, at first. Could this actually be happening? I only really set out to do a magazine layout, and I did that, so I figured, what next, what time frame, and how? Thats the reason for inquiring about video. Never did I think that anyone would say yes, well, in the back of my mind, I hoped to entertain the thought.

So I ran with it. After a few details were worked out, and getting the ever cautious approval from the Husbear, I was on a plane for a quick trip to sunny San Francisco, CA to become a video star for a weekend. Now keep in mind, I had never done anything like this before in my life other than in the privacy of my own home in front of a webcam or maybe my own video camera at best. How would I "perform" in the real world in front of who knows how many cameras at the cue of a director watching my every move? What if I get out there, trip and hotel paid for and I fail to "get it up"? Just what the hell did I get myself into? Well, no better way to find out other than just to go out there and wait for the cliche "Action" call. So just do it and see what happens. Well, long story short, I did just that. I went out there, had a great time, met and worked with a lot of great people, all professionals, and cant wait for the final cut to come out, in early August!!! Yes, in plain terms, I DID A VIDEO!!!!! ME!! I ACTUALLY DID A VIDEO!!!! HOW COOL IS THAT??? ok, inside voice now. Lets continue.

If its any indication as to how well I might have done, I was originally slated to go out there and do only 2 scenes, but after a series of events took place and other people had to call out of the shoot, I was quickly bumped up to a third scene, and the movie reworked around a little more of me as a character, which is SWEET. How many people get to be in a movie as an extra and work their way up to one of the main characters in the same movie? Maybe more than I know, but its unheard of in my book. So several fantasies were fulfilled in one swoop. Will this lead to others? Time will only tell. I wont give out the name of the company yet until the release date. Just know its coming very soon.

I look back and cant believe I did it myself. But when the release finally happens, thats when it will really sink in I guess. What have I gotten myself into? Could this be the start of something bigger than I ever imagined? Who knows? All I know is that I gave it my best for what its worth, am proud of the job I did, and cant wait to see it on the "big screen", lol, of course meaning holed up in my living room with the curtains drawn and peeping thru the corner of my eye. What will I look like on camera? U know people hate the way they sound when their recorded voice is heard, how's having sex on camera going to look and sound? I guess I'll find out.

As far as U guys seeing the finished result? I dont even know the name of the movie yet, but when it comes out the first part of August, I will post a link directly the order site to pick up your own copy. So stay tuned, this ride is just getting started.

When I started this post, I mentioned a birth of sorts. Well, when I was in SF going over the first scene, and yes, they actually go over scenes, and not just throw two guys in a room and say “Now Fuck” , filling out paperwork and all that entails, there was a space on the form that asked for a "stage name". I thought of it for a while, and I first offered up just plain old "Woof", why not, its what I always used. The producer said he'd rather shy away from names that resemble screen names so I was asked to think of something new. Which is completely understandable, so I thought and thought for about 30 more seconds and during that time, thought of the old adage, and maybe U tried this too, coming up with a name by putting your first pet's name and the first street U lived on as a stage name. Well I quickly would have lost all points if U were to see me on a DVD box somewhere under the name Poochie Breckenridge. Im sorry, but that just wouldnt work in porn, lol, at least not in my book. So I thought a little more and finally, I had my answer, a light came on above my head, literally. No, literally, they were about to start shooting behind me, and "Harry Wolfe" was born. Hey, I didnt wanna stray too much from the original, so this helped me stay close enough to that.

More on the movie to cum very soon,

Harry Wolfe

 

7/4/05

First and foremost, I want to give a huge earth shattering round of applause and appreciation to the artwork and design that went into this, my birthday present of a website put together by two of my closest friends, JizzJazz69 and his partner, Montenegro. I had been giving it some serious thought of giving this site a complete overhaul for quite a while now but had no idea of what I wanted to do with it. This was the perfect solution to get it off the back burner and bring it to life. I hope U like it as much as I did when I first saw it. Personally, I am blown away by the overall concept and to me, its much easier to navigate and organize. Trust me, after 3 years of constantly adding pics and ideas here and there without taking out anything in the background, it got almost too worrisome to even make small changes without completely fucking up something else without knowing. So it’s a perfect end to an all too complicated means. I appreciate them for that more than they will ever know. Check out JizzJazz69’s blog sometime when U get the chance. He always has something extremely insightful on his mind and U just might learn something new.

They visited me over Pride Weekend here in Atlanta to celebrate both my birthday and to also celebrate their first Pride Weekend ever. I took pleasure in showing them around the entire weekend knowing that this Pride would set the pace for what they were to expect out of others wherever they go in the future, so why not start it with a bang. We did everything a gay tourist would want to do, which was fun for me also, since I hadn’t really done those things in so long myself. Living here, as any other place, U often times fail to see or do whats right in front of your face for the fact that U live here, why put out the effort? It will be there when U get around to it. Needless to say, by the end of it all, the Pride parade included, and the festivities thereof, I was so tired by Monday that I had to take the day off and still wasn’t myself on Tuesday at work, lol. But here I am, a week later, celebrating the 4th of July, yet another long weekend on the town with friends, putzing around the house with the Husbear, and having plenty of impromptu naps along the way, by this writing, it is the 3rd such nap in only 2 days, and Im not done yet. It is a 3 day weekend, lol. Last weekend was also pretty neat in that I actually got to meet a few of U guys that come to the site. I apparently have a few guys out in South Carolina that read my sporadic writings from time to time. So Im sending a big shout out to U. U guys seemed like a lot of fun. Aah, another time maybe.

In other news, I have started my pledging process with the men of Onyx, a black leather club that has a chapter here in Atlanta. The guys have been great to me and the closeness of the group is something I really think Im going to enjoy. I’ll keep U informed on how it goes.

I feel like I have so much more to tell U guys, and believe me, I do, but Im gonna keep this one short, if it isn’t already too late for that. I’m going to hold that til next time. And believe me, U will want to hear this news. I think this is bigger than anything I have ever done pertaining to this site and I really hope U like it. I have told a handful of my closest friends and they are extremely excited for me as well. So with that in mind, stay tuned for details.

Until then, keep writing in, I love hearing from U guys, lemme know whats goin on with U, and we’ll be in touch, that’s for sure.

Woof

6/9/05